neveahscottis.11293310.logentry001
29 Nov 2024Neveah Scottis
There is a mass evacuation underway within the Sol system. Yes, that system. Our home. I've always wanted to aid the weak and wounded, and to save lives. Human or otherwise. This entire scenario is my calling. It beckons to me all so much.But, I refuse to participate. It pains me to say this, but I cannot, and will not be there for those who need me.
I would say that I am defeated and that I am done. The failure to grasp one's own mission of benevolence ought to indeed imbue one with emotional pain and spiritual torment.
If not for the fact that there is purpose to my decision. Indeed, it is my decision to make. Given my own personal circumstances, I suppose.
It is not that I am far from the Bubble, in the midst of an exploration adventure, mostly incapable of suddenly forsaking it for this one thing.
It is not the support for my Power or any such hatred of the Federation that is the cause for my lack of participation.
It is not because I am lazy or heartless. The opposite is quite true, as a matter of fact.
It is not fear of the Thargoid phenomenon that is giving me pause.
I just do not have the means to adequately provide assistance. I have yet to encounter a Thargoid myself, but I know enough about them to understand very well that they cannot be underestimated.
I do not have a vessel that is fitted to deal with this threat.
If I show up now, I won't be the only one to die. And if I live, it'd be by a hair. To travel to and fro the Sol system under constant threat of interdiction doesn't help my odds one bit. Sooner or later, my vessel will combust under caustic chaos, and the lives of many will go along with it.
My presence is vacant not because I feel nothing and do not care to help. It is because I do not want to be responsible for the very thing I am trying to prevent. In that way, I am still doing my part.
I think I can find peace in that.