Untitled Uncertain: Another Meaningless Colonia Log
09 Mar 2022Meowers
Today my neighbour in Komotae asked me if I'm okay. Of course I'm not! But what makes me tell you about this? Because it was the first time in my whole damn life when that geezer asked me something in such a polite tone. Why a man whose only interests were beer, GalNet shows and cheapest aftermarket Hauler parts was suddenly so surprised seeing me? He said he hadn't seen me for several weeks after I rushed into my living compartment, took a flight suit and a keycard for Marshmallow and hurried to the hangars.
So, what happened?
Latest events were rather... heavy. So I decided to stay in the place where I keep my stuff for a bit longer and unwind. And by 'unwind' I mean visiting all the cafés here on Bluford and making a chicken map. Ah, I'll never be lithe eating so much. Not a big problem though. Also, I heard that chicken diet can turn you into a space pilot. Sadly, it's too late for me, as I'm already one, but I hope this information could be useful for someone else. Then something just... Clicked in my brain. Quickly I stuffed the rest of my meal into my mouth, poured a cup of coffee over it to prevent unwanted hiccups and went to my cabin.
I've never been to Colonia!
Some would say that I plotted my path to that place only to visit another engineer and make some magical bingo-bongo over my shield recharge batteries. But hey, a samurai has no goal, only path. And going a long path in space will eventually make you an Elite Explorer. Ah, stop, my PF records says that I already have such rank. However, what's the reason to be one if there are nobody around to see and be amazed by your elite-ness in exploration? So, that's why people write their travelling logs. And, for some reason, they like Colonia. They plan their journeys, pack their stuff as if they're not going back in a year, and depart, leaving hundreds of messages like "Yaaaay! Look at me! I'm going to Colonia!" everywhere and then broadcasting so many logs that sometimes it's hard to find anyhing else to read. So, why shouldn't I have one of these too?
For me, Colonia looks like a mount Everest on good old Earth. Climbing it was really a deadly challenge in the beginning, but then people built those routes and bases, those 20th century equivalents of that new Colonia Bridge, technical progress provided them with some new boots and pants, and voila! There's a queue on the summit, people are standing there and waiting for their turn to plant a flag and make a photo. And the mountain became littered with empty bottles and snack bags. If you pay enough, you could even travel there piggyback-style. If you pay even more, you could order a pizza delivery.
Enormous fuel tank - check. Enormous fuel sc... Argh! I have two tier 4 slots and they're occupied by those recharge batteries that I should bring to a weird guy who decided to run his engineering business there, because those moronic official regulations still can't allow us to carry ship modules in cargo containers. Officially. Ah, okay. Let it be tier 2 fuel scoop and I will be super slow. Slow, but persistent!
When you travel long enough, you start to think that stars are watching you. Especially if you see this.
(Hey, stop it!)
Also, I've seen an interesting stellar phenomena somewhere on the halfway. A great friend of mine who covered a million of light years told me about that thing and I was prepared. I've heard some people call it 'Brabenisation of Space and Time'.
(At least I was ready for it)
Do you want to know more? About what exactly? Jumping and scooping and some boring reflections along the way? Nope. I'm not going to write that. Let's just say that eventually I arrived in Colonia and landed on Jaques station. And don't forget, this Fer-de-Lance is in top 1% of weird messed up long travel ships out there.
(I think I should have that kind of photo as well)
I heard that living in distant places could be bad for your mental health, but what happened to this fellow was just off the scale. I've reached him to ask why he tries to go through the wall... Or to beat it with his head... Or whatever. But then he just jumped aside and ran away. I hope they have a spare straight jacket.
(Looks like he's seriously not okay)
And what's the reason of visiting those places if you don't make a photo to show it and brag about being there? Here's the Colonia Mug Shot. It's like Hutton Mug Shot, but in Colonia. Ah, okay, there's no special mugs in Colonia... Maybe except this one.
(Look, mum! I was there!)
So then I looked on the Galaxy map and went completely crazy. Like, I made it to Colonia on a Fer-de-Lance with a tier 2 fuel scoop, I'm already crazy, but it wasn't enough... Let's go to the centre!
Been there, wasn't impressed. I'm a crappy tourist.
(This photo will give me +100 points of exploration respect)
So that's why I weren't in Komotae for a couple of weeks.
Oh, crap, I forgot to take a photo in Explorer's Anchorage. I think I should go back.
* * *
Yeah, I wrote a lot of serious things recently, but that doesn't mean that I'm going to stop writing humourous logs. 'Untitled Uncertain' aren't meant to be a 'series', rather a collection of funny stuff that I'll put here and there, trying not to break the main 'storyline'. And I'll make a separate list of them later, when, and if, there will be enough of them.