Goodnight, Sweet Prince
10 May 2021Monkey Knuts
All things must eventually run their course. Some experiences can last a lifetime but others can be over in the blink of an eye. That is just the way of things.Today, one of those things reached the end of its course and I find myself bittersweet at its close.
Seventy-nine days ago I signed my life away to an Imperial Pirate. His crew had so much to offer me and as a brand new Commander I found it hard to say no. They gave me the credits that I needed to get set up with my first ship, to travel through the black to my new home; they taught me to mine, to fuel scoop and to trade in the most dubious sectors. I couldn't thank them enough for the opportunities.
Time passed and soon I was helping to support their efforts in raising their influence throughout the stars. I would jump from system to system delivering data and supplies to our allies. I even served my time at the helm of my Type 9 Hippo avoiding pirates and delivering preposterous amounts of cargo with my wing mates; all in the aid of feathering our nests and those of our fellow crewmates.
We travelled the stars and I honed my skills further. I saw Crystal Shards, Black Holes and the most incredible nebulae all with my crew by my side.
It wasn't all comets and wormholes though. Soon, too soon by my reckoning, I started to see behind the curtain. The black has so much promise but for its human occupants. We have an entire galaxy to play with; barely any of it has been discovered but yet we can't help but fight with each other instead. Our common purpose is not of exploration but of conflict. We just can't seem to help ourselves... no wonder the Thargoids judge us so harshly. They must see infants running around throwing stones at each other, and them, instead of as an equal or at least as a species worthy of respect. I mean can you blame them?
So I adopted a new mantle. That of a diplomat. Independent and intolerant of the infancy that we're so desperate to show off. I tried for peace but it was rebuffed. I tried for reason but none could be found. Instead we just kept throwing stones at each other.
I found myself yearning for the black, away from the infants, from the fighting and the hostility. I took a trip, away from the front, almost two thousand lightyears away in fact on a public carrier. It was nice to be in the peace and the quiet away from it all. It didn't last long though and soon I was back. I jumped home only to find that my system was on fire. It all felt so petty. I tried to help. I tried to give my time once more to the crew that had taken me under their collective wing but I couldn't shake the feeling that this wasn't what I wanted. I yearned for the black, for those nebulae, for the black holes and the terrifying maw of the neutron highway.
I tried to be the diplomat once more. This time though my focus was inwards towards my crew and our allies. The conflict had been divisive and it was time to heal for the good of us all. We needed to rid ourselves of a boiling toxicity and come out as the stronger crew that we can be.
Alas though, human nature took its course once more, the frustrations were clear and the minds divided. Despite our best efforts, peace was never really an option, no matter how much we wanted it. Our enemies had made that abundantly and painfully clear but what got me was our own desire to keep stirring the pot. It wasn't enough to ignore them. Everyone had to get even. Our enemies weren't ignoring us so why should we afford them the same courtesy? The simple answer: because we're better than that. The very Empire that we swore our allegiance to was coming under attack from all sides. This silly spat would become a distant memory and nothing more. There were bigger fish to fry.
Still the local conflict raged despite our best efforts and soon talk turned to mercenaries. The systems had become so terribly busy. We were under attack from these guns for hire so why not bid higher, send them back to their old masters? I made it clear that negotiating with terrorists will only bring more down upon us. We make ourselves targets for those seeking to make a quick fortune and for what? We can't be made to retreat and we're a large enough crew to repair the damage as our enemies quickly run out of money. No, we focus on our friends, our allies and crew. The best thing to do when faced by a bully is just to ignore them. They'll get bored and go away eventually - or do something bad enough that a higher power makes them leave instead. The result is still the same.
I still found myself wanting though. I felt the black weighing down upon me. The unexplored regions calling out to me. What secrets do those uncharted sectors hold? I would never know though so long as I was tied up in the station holding back the dust kickers. I found I was leaving the dock less and less. I didn't want to fly that day or the next or the next. I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I was miserable and no matter how hard I tried to make things better, I just couldn't bring myself out of it.
I booked myself onto another public carrier and disappeared into the black again. No uniform, no titles or crew. Just me and my Lonestar off to see the Galaxy. I found all kinds of things over the next few days that I hadn't seen before. I even met some Commanders that, like me, were just out floating in the black with nothing better to do than honk at planets.
They reminded me of what it is that this galaxy has to offer. It isn't war but it isn't peace either. The Galaxy is more than capable of killing you without any assistance. It's brutal, it's violent, it's beautiful and it's infinitely more interesting than anything you can throw your stones at. It's about the journey. We will never know all of its secrets but do we not owe it to ourselves to try?
I dreamed of exploration growing up. My imagination burned with the endless possibilities of what could be out there. Now as an adult I can make that dream come true at least in my own little way. I can't do that though with my ship tied up in a dock waiting for the next infant to throw a stone.
So here we are. The point at which our union has run its course. I hope our home comes out of this conflict stronger and better than before. I hope one day to see it and to see our name across the stars. Wouldn't that be something?!
Thank you my Prince, my crew and my friends. You've given me so much and I will be forever thankful. It's time though for us to part ways and for me to head out into the black to find whatever it is that you're supposed to find out there.
One man and his Lonestar off to see the galaxy!