Kasumi's Personal Log (1)
04 Jan 2024Kasumi Goto
Public logDecember 17, 3309
Alba said I should write this. To... help me. And to make it public. So people think I am 'safe'. She was nice.
I don't understand. They say... things, like I did something wrong. But I don't remember. I don't remember what I did wrong. I don't know what to write.
There are always a lot of people, asking... questions. Doing 'tests'. Doctors and 'psychologists', they say they are called. The doctors talk about... things, inside me, often. An "implant", they call it. It 'woke up'... a few days. After I did.
I hear things... inside my head. Voices. But I don't understand them. Sometimes they are quiet, or not there. Sometimes they are loud. And something inside me is changing. There is... something, on my hand. A "glyph", but I don't know what the word means. It looks strange. Sometimes, it makes a funny glow, when I feel... things. Most of the time, it looks... white.
Why am I not 'safe'? They don't want to say. But it... is because of the voices. They said, "they can tell people to do bad things". Did they tell me to do bad things? Why am I hearing these voices? I don't like... how they sound. They are angry. I don't want them to be angry.
I am on a "ship". In "space". Where there are stars. But I see no stars, It is all walls around me, in a big room. With... plants, inside. I need to stay there while I "recover". Because I nearly 'died'. I can't remember why. Maybe because of it.
There was a woman today... "Jana", she called herself. She gave me a... thing. A 'VR device', it says on its box. I saw her... in pictures. On a... machine, my own. A small 'computer', on my wrist. Holding... logs, and pictures. Of me. That I... made.
The pictures were funny. We looked so big on them. Made our... hips, and breasts, very big. In that 'VR' thing. She said it was an 'experiment', and that I 'liked' it. But she doesn't look like that... I don't know the word. Where I see with my eyes. The pictures looked funny. There was even a very tall other woman, but I don't remember. Remember her. It looked too tall. I don't know if I... like that.
Jana said I could use the 'VR'... thing. Machine. To 'help me find memories'. Maybe. I don't know all she said. It is still difficult... to remember. She said we had fun with it.
Maybe I will. I feel... strange things. Looking at me, but 'big'. She said it was not 'connected' while they... figure... out. If I am 'safe'. But that 'things' were loaded into it. For me to 'play'.
I asked her. If she knew me... before. But she didn't. Only in that 'virtual' space. That she helped 'rescue' me. And I asked if she could make the voices quiet, but she can't. She doesn't know why I hear them. Said I could try to listen... to other voices. To not listen to them in my head.
Jana looked sad. I don't know why. Maybe... because she couldn't stay long. She said she had to help other people. To make sure they don't... 'go through what I am'. Maybe. I don't remember... what she said.
She left after that. I had asked... for a projector. Of stars. The sky. A few hours ago. Or she said she would ask for one. It would be nice.
Maybe I will get to see the stars myself one day.
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