Logbook entry

Confessions of the girl who doesnt exist

26 Nov 2023Miseri
OR ANOTHER TITLE MIGHT BE
-To Mr. No Name and the ACA thanks for everything, Hummingbird! 1
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I have to assume that right about now you and the rest of your team are asking yourselves who exactly it is you have in you custody.
Or maybe that doesnt really matter to you, I think I gravely misjudged you in Wandrama and in hind site our jovial nature and light hearted banter
from your perspective may have seemed to be taunting of your foe and ill natured, you must have been biting your tongue so hard to be polite to my overly familiar tone during the process of the accord. I am feeling that this mistake of mine is going to be the end of me, it is only now that I have been made fully aware of how far this crusade of yours stretches, or maybe I was just being naïve thinking that you and I had reached some sort of understanding beyond just simple words.

Tomorrow you will hang me, perhaps not literally, but I am almost certainly not going to walk out of this one alive. This is possibly on the simple account that I am in fact a person who has some ties to that thing which we both often refer to as The Club.
I do not know how much past that I will be able to get tomorrow, either i expect you to immediately end the trial and have me shot on the spot or I will break down and be unable to start talking coherent sentences for multiple minutes at a time. Then I suppose there is always the third option of someone else taking me out before then as well, and I guess I feel I owe it to you all to have a back up in case of things going south, so here goes everything...

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The Charlatan priestess and girl who didnt exist
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I bet you are all expecting this to start of with a long winded discussion about my parental claims about Dr Wycherly.
Actually the truth is, I do have some of his genes. My mother is Dian LaRosa a Club member herself and a savant in the field of genetic cloning.
She and Caleb were sort of like lab partners in their INRA days and when she wanted to create a better clone she sought his help and even asked for his genes as a sample template for use in the future.
To put it simply im a Chimeric clone , I contain the DNA of both of them mashed together in some unholy super science mangle. He even went so far as to help her get some of those metabolic alloys that were still hush hush in those days, she used them to reinforce my skeletal structure.
My mother would go on to work for Walden on Lave, but I would get shunted off to a reform school after my grandfathers (Dian's biological father) passed away.

= THE ANCILLA GIRLS REFORMATORY SCHOOL =
I shall for the sake of time spare you the dreadfully dull story of my life working and toiling as assistant director* of a Club asset training hall masquerading as a school for girls run by a cult of space witch's.
I shall fast forward to what matters. The day I started the lies.
Allow me to set the stage.
The school is on fire. Literally in some places. I have 49 of the Clubs best assets dead around the grounds, one dead high priestess director and a sucking knife wound of about 3 inches into my abdominal.
The comms screen is blaring and its a message that CANNOT be refused because its from , you guessed, the Handler of the school.
You actually will probably enjoy knowing that the old woman who had tutored me so well in things all that time at the school was just like you guys, she despised them, and she couldnt bear the thought of leaving such a weapon in the hands of people like the Club so she had arranged this all in an attempt to eliminate something valuable and hinder them.
That day she had arranged for me to send out messages to all of the girls out in the field , I didnt know it at the time but she had sent in the messages a simple command. The one who killed me got to be the first in line to be next head of the school. Turns out she had always despised me, turns out my great grandmother was the Ancilla who had sucked them into the Club and she thought this was poetic justice.

When the girls started coming in for the hunt thats when explosions started. The old witch had trapped the school grounds. I was just bait to lure them all back for the slaughter, By the time I actually got back and found the carnage all that was left was the old woman sitting in the communications room laughing to herself. My first mistake was getting close to her to check on her like I had many of the other girls I had passed thru on my way back to her, thats when she caught me in the ribs with a knife. I did not mean to defend myself but... my body has faster reflexes then I have time to think and my hands... She lay there laughing and coughing up blood, told me she was surprised because she didnt think I actually had it in me. The truth is I didn't. If my body didnt move on its own in that moment im sure I would have been dead like the other girls that day.
I dont remember how long it was I sat there that but i know the blaring from the comms panel and the acrid smoke and the smell of blood, all of it mixing.
and then something snapped in me that day.
I remember thinking I was going to live just to spite that old hag.
I remember hitting open line on the panel for the comms.,
And then the lies began...
"High Priestess Hummingbird speaking, How may the Ancilla serve you today my masters "

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Here Laid Before You Bare
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Have you leapt from your seat in rage yet Mr. No Name, what do you think, yes I am guilty like I said, im a club conspirator. knowingly
by choice. because my only other choice was death. I put on a song and dance and made them think I was a nice little assassin they could wind up and put out to work, I told them that I would let other contractors handle most jobs, I started shipping things out to small paramilitary spec ops units.
I was always better at logistics then combat, in truth im also not a highly trained deadly anything, my body has an autonomic defense response, just one of those nifty things your mom puts in when shes a super scientist. But im not really trained to kill, well i mean at least I wasnt back then.
At some point the orders stopped coming to her, maybe her handler got bored or dead, or maybe they just forgot about us?
Either way one day the cryostasis ended and there was no one to give the orders anymore.
Maybe The Club thought their hypnogogic psychosis bullshit would keep their dog on a leash even after they left her to starve.


In the end this is all that I am now, bits of old me and new me all mixed together.
I am a con artist using my flimsy memories and the lucky happenstance of being tangentially related to a prominent figure and suspected club member to attempt appeal to my former masters good graces in the hopes that they might deem me worthy of their orders once again. All in the hopes that I might just get close enough one day, you know what they say about maids. We can go where nobody else can go. People trust a good servant more then family sometimes.
Please know that you and yours were never then intended target of my deceptions
Im sorry that my method of survival in their web of deception is antithetical to how you live your life Mr No Name.
I admit im a coward, who took the easy option , i chose to bow down and snivel and sneer, just like id been trained to my whole life.
BUT I WILL PUT ON THAT COLLAR IF IT GETS ME WITHIN INCHES OF SINKING A FANG INTO ONE OF THEIR THROATS
AND VOID HELP ME IF MY LAST 100 YEARS OF TEDIOUS SERVITUDE TO THESE MONSTERS IS WASTED BY YOU AND YOUR BAND OF FREEDOM FIGHTERS
THIS WAS NEVER ABOUT AZIMUTH !!!!

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I want to Thank you again for your hospitality while in your care.
Sincerely,
High Priestess of the Ancilla Girls Reformatory School
Anri "Hummingbird" LaRosa
Please make sure when you take this old dog of the club out back you put two bullets in her just to make sure


1. - The Confessions of the girl who doesn't exist Playlist -
Bonus Playlist
I wanted to take a little time to put a little something extra into this last chapter of my first act so ive taken time to compile a short song list that contains character and thematically connecting themes.

Song 1 . Is special because two years ago it actually was responsible for sparking the thought that would become the archetype I have come to call The charlatan priestess. This song could be considered the theme song of this storyline.

Song 2 and 3. Both of these songs are direct and tacit admissions of understanding to Mr Behind the mask of just what I feel about The Club

Song 4. An admission of my acts of deception as a witch and that my machinations are now undone and revealed to you

Song 5. My true sincere apology that my actions caught up with me and that you were NOT the intended target of my ruse. I am a product of my upbringing and my actions were not excusable but they were the only ones I had to make at that time.

Song 6. A song for a woman awaiting execution

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