Logbook entry

Korzhakov / 13 Feb 3306
focused but blurry

The elevator stops at the landing, and like a drone, I walk slowly to my apartment, I open the door and it's all there, my normal life, my cat, my girlfriend, my world.

I drop my pack off, get out f my Remlok and take a shower. I put on a t shirt and pj's and walk out into the living room. Jean greets me with a long, understanding hug. I have been out of system for a couple of weeks while my faction was at war. We lost that war and since then I have been furiously going through the process of gaining access to higher grade engineers to focus my new corvette to a razors edge.

I have been so focused on battle and engineering that while that has been as clear to me as anything in my life, everything that is normal has been fuzzy and in the background.

I personally slaughtered hundreds of ships from our enemies faction. left a debris field over that gas giant. My wing mates and I regaling tales at the bar each night after our many battles.

Now I am home and I have to get my mind clear and focused again, but on life, my future, the stability of my system and my faction. Jean brings me a plate of food as I am sitting at the counter. As I eat and start to converse with her the fog begins to lift. I am able to see my normal surroundings and get my mind back in the room where it belongs. It takes a few minutes, but finally, I am fully here.

I settle into the couch with Jean snuggled up next to me, this is how it should be. Her and I in our own little paradise. I savor the moment. Because we may be back at war soon. I want to be here, now for her and for me. My plans don't end because of my allegiance, they just get put on hold.

We talk about what I have been through the past couple of weeks. The need for me to rest and do nothing for a couple of days except take this beautiful woman out for dinner and shopping. She deserves my attention and the work on our relationship is my most important ever. I think maybe her and I might take a little trip to get away from it all. She is in a position that she can work from wherever she is. I'll talk with her about it more.
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