Grief
25 Aug 2019Maul Montresor
"Hiya!"I jumped awake and looked around the dark hospital room. The words sent chills through my body. The voice was clearly that of Tessa's daughter Lydia.
As I rolled over to go back to sleep my vision began to glitch.
"Fucking cybernetics" I rubbed my eyes. It was a pretty pointless thing do, it never helped.
When I opened my eyes again there she was, just standing there with a smile.
"You're the nice man who got me ice cream!"
I nearly jumped out of my bed. Did she really remember that? Wait a second. She can't be real but still I found myself answering her.
"Yeah, that was me."
"Thought so!" She said as she walked around the room touching everything and giggling.
This wasn't real. I watched Bryce blow the ship up.
"It's okay."
She said it like she was reading my thoughts. Can she hear me right now?
"It's not your fault."
Yes it was.
"Nu uh, the bad man did it."
He wouldn't have had the chance if I would have just tried to save her first.
"I'm sorry, Lydia."
She dropped her head and walked closer to me.
"Don't feel bad. I don't like when people feel bad."
This kid was trying to tear my heart out.
I sat up on the edge of the bed and she sat beside me.
She looked up at me.
"I wish I had ice cream."
"I can go try to get you some."
What was I saying? SHE ISN'T REAL! This shit is in my head!
"No, I wish I had ice cream for you." She said with a half hearted smile.
"Ice cream can help you not be sad."
No amount of ice cream was going to bring this kid back. She's gone and it's my fault.
I dropped my head into my hands.
"Lydia, I'm so sorry. I could have done more. I SHOULD have done more. I let you down. I let Vega down. I let myself down."
"Mr. Montresor?" A voice came from behind me.
I turned to see the silhouette of a nurse standing in the doorway.
"Are you okay?"
I looked around the now dimly lit room and the kid was gone.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Just having trouble sleeping."
I laid back in my bed.
"Is there anything I can get you?"
I knew exactly what I needed.
"Can I get some ice cream?"
She smiled and nodded as she closed the door.