Logbook entry

March 20, 3310 - 2 Days till Departure

20 Mar 2024Havocon
I'm finished with the primary prepping stage of my trip to Colonia. I just flew to the start point and tested out a few of my systems. When I got to Yang Hub in LHS 3295, I picked up a Field Repair unit. Also, getting the last few pieces in place so I can document my journey properly, make sure I've got enough supplies and I've outfitted my ship properly. After almost a decade of flying in the black, I'm finally going to do this. I need to do this.

I've restarted a lot, over the years. Jobs, schools, relationships, even homes. I never really cared for the things I lost when I did that, because I always thought I could just get it back later or I didn't really need it. And for the most part that was true. These past two years however, I lost things I'll never get back. Even though I tried restarting. The universe was telling me just stop and accept it for what it is. To dedicate myself to something.

While this is only a small trip, that hundreds have done, multiple times. This is a first step for me. While the idea originally came to me because I had lost my first-born while still in the womb, preparing for it has made me realize so many other things. I wanted this trip to be about me going into the stars so I could pretended for a few moments, that she was here. That I could show her the galaxy without the cracks in the glass life gives us along the way. Lilith's loss may have been the straw that broke the back, it also blinded me to the three wonderful beings I already had. Two fantastic step children, and a fiancé who's love and support has been more then I deserved. They all are with me on this trip, even though they are not

So, while I hope I can honor Lilith with this trip, I dedicate this to my family. Those I've lost, and those I've gained. This is a trip, to finally say to the universe, "Sorry I'm late. But I've arrived."
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