Greater Mysteries
08 Sep 2022Ember Lacson
This is kind of the first time I've gotten a free moment to sit down and write since last logbook. I'll admit I've had a lot more free time over the last couple days where I could have written stuff down, but I made the conscious decision not to, choosing to spend that time with Nicole and other members of the crew instead. We decided to venture out into Guardian space to complete Ram Tah's assignment. Naturally, I'm not the first CMDR to go out and do this, and Canonn has some great tools to make the task as painless as possible. The decision was driven in part by the matter Nicole wanted to discuss with me as I finished the last entry. No worries about whatever our relationship is; that's something we're still trying to define, but it's not in a bad place. What is in a bad place is her mental health with all this talk about the Anomaly.
She started the conversation by asking me if we could take the carrier on an exploration tour for a couple weeks to cool down. I said absolutely and told her about my errand for Ram Tah and said we would probably have to travel a couple thousand light years, plus we could visit any nebulae or interesting sights she had in mind. She sat down on my bed and explained that she had tried to contact me at least ten times when I was out past Barnard's Loop. She wanted me to turn right around and come back, and she had been on edge the rest of the time I had been away, no matter how much the other crewmembers tried to assure her I would be fine. She said that after she received my check-in message from Shenve, she went on the net and found some info about the Anomaly. When she saw the high-res photo, she got a strong feeling of recognition and an even stronger sense of dread. She felt she had seen it before, but she couldn't figure out where. Then, when she listened to the FSS audio she had a full-blown panic attack and made a beeline for sickbay. They were able to get her on some sedatives before long, and she told them what happened. Dr. Mason immediately sent out for a hypnotherapist who was willing to see her, and in a few hours someone came over from Felice Dock and sat with her for about fifty minutes. I'll put the transcript below.
Dr. W: Hello, Nicole. I'm Doctor West. Dr. Mason tells me you need some help remembering something that your brain doesn't want you to. Is that right?
Nicole: Yes. I had a panic attack, and I think it might be connected to a recurring nightmare I've been having.
Dr. M: It was triggered by info on this unknown anomaly out past Barnard's Loop. The carrier owner is a close friend of hers, and he's heading out there to investigate it.
Nicole: I know I've seen it before, but I don't remember where. All I know is I have the same feeling when I wake up from that one nightmare.
Dr. W: I see. That sounds like something I can help you with. Have you ever undergone hypnosis before?
Nicole: No.
Dr. W: It is a very simple process. All you have to do is trust me and follow my instructions precisely. There's no harm if you get it wrong; if you do, just try again. If at any point you want to stop, say the word "Niflheim," and I will bring you out of the trance. Understood? Good. Give me your hand.
Hypnotic induction skipped for brevity.
Dr. W: When I say the word "stanchion," you will forget all information about the Anomaly. This amnesia will last until I wake you up at the end of the session. Stanchion. Do you remember having a panic attack?
Nicole: Yes.
Dr. W: Do you remember what triggered it?
Nicole: No. Isn't that why you're here?
Dr. W: Yes, it is. Now we must go into a deeper sleep where dreams reside. I will count backwards from one hundred. As I count, feel the numbers pull you into a deeper state of relaxation. Feel your eyelids grow even heavier and close even further. When you arrive, tell me what you see.
Transcript resumes when Nicole begins dream narration.
Nicole: I am floating in space. No ship, just my suit. I do not recognize the starfield. The stars of the Milky Way look more densely packed. I see several nebulae: Barnard's Loop, Horsehead, Witch Head, among others that I can't identify. I hear a sound. It is a low, droning sound with muffled, rhthmic patterns. Predator meets Bloop. Hydrophone-esque. Nicole is visually distressed as she describes the sound. I turn around. Nicole grimaces as if trying to squint. Blazing light. Red-orange dot at the center. Blue and yellow-green rays spiral outward. The drone sound is overwhelming. AAH!
Dr. W: Nicole?
Nicole: The Roar! It's so loud! Nicole's body relaxes and her breathing grows calm again. It's leaving. Traveling to another star system. I follow, but I cannot fly fast enough. There are Thargoids here. So many Thargoids. They're pulling human ships out of hyperspace. Now more human ships are arriving, but they cannot reach the strange star. More humans are coming. More hyperdict— oh my God, they just destroyed one of the humans! And another! Why are they shooting? Those ships were unarmed! Nicole pauses to calm herself. I'm losing ground. They keep hyperdicting. Many are peaceful. Many are not. I see a debris field in the strange star's wake. But I cannot tell where it is... Oh God, they know I'm here. They are surrounding me. Scanning me. No... No! That's a tractor beam! It has me, pulling me into its....
The scene changes.
Nicole: I smell ammonia. The room is musty. Humid. I'm not wearing my suit anymore. I stand up. The floor is firm. I can't see, but I think I know the way. I walk forward. A strange, organic-looking door opens ahead of me. There are...drone-looking things floating down the corridor. They see me. One is stopping to scan me. No, it's moving on. Oh great, I'm naked. It's one of those dreams. But it's fine; I'm the only one here. I feel like I shouldn't be able to breathe, but I can. Like dreams when I can breathe underwater. I'm following the drone that scanned me. This looks like a central room of some kind. There's a...a star map, it looks like, above the structure in the center. There's a line. A route? I can't tell where it's leading. But it's going somewhere. I just heard a door open and— Oh God! Niflheim! Niflheim!
Dr. W: Sleep. Nicole goes limp. The dream is ended. The danger is passed. I'm going to count forward. By the time I reach the number five, you will have forgotten the dream in the same manner you forget a pleasant one. When I reach ten, you will awaken. You will feel rejuvenated after this profound and successful relaxation. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. Nicole opens her eyes. How do you feel, Nicole?
Nicole Well rested.
Dr. W: Do you remember anything?
Nicole: The Anomaly.... It's what I've been seeing in my dream, isn't it? I know I've seen it before, and that is the only place I can think of.
Dr. W: Let me check. He searches for images of the anomaly. Yes.
Nicole: Then Ember's in danger, isn't he? We have to try to reach him!
Dr. W: Do you think he can handle himself if you can't?
Nicole: Long pause. Yes. But I have to try. I love him. I can't lose him. But I know he'll get out of there if he senses it's time.
She was right about that. As soon as I heard there were hostile hyperdictions, I turned around and headed home. By that point she had given up on trying to contact me, partly as an exercise in taking back control of her mental health. She said that after the hypnotherapy session she had started retaining fragments of the dream in her memory; however, she still had no idea what had caused her to panic like that at the end. When asked if she had ever seen photos or video of an active Thargoid surface site, she shook her head. So I showed her. And of course, any of you who know about surface sites would have been able to identify the place in her dream. But she said there were things about it that were different. First, there was the atmosphere. I don't think we've found any sites on atmospheric worlds, but I don't think that's outside the realm of possibility, especially given their apparent affinity for ammonia worlds. But second and most important were the evidence of a route on the star map and the fact that the ground felt more chitinous than rocky.
With this info, I can only conclude that this nightmare is evidence of a Titan or some kind of capital ship traveling through the galaxy. Whether the Anomaly portion and the capital ship portion are directly connected remains to be seen, but I have a feeling the next few months will provide some answers.
That's it for now, though. I have a lot of thoughts about this Guardian data collection mission, but I think I need to finish it first and confront Ram Tah about a couple things. Suffice it to say, I can definitely see why Malik doesn't trust him.