LOG #074 - Commander A. Adair - TITAN Contractors
19 Oct 2021Aurora Adair (Radiumio)
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Initiating voice-recording...
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LOG: #074
RECORDING TYPE: Personal Log LOG PUBLICISED
What does Log Publicised mean?
In our squadron lore, these logbooks are not supposed to be publicly viewable by Commanders. However, in some circumstances, a log may be compromised OR publicised, allowing it to be considered publicly viewable - in this case, the information within can be used for story or discussion purposes in-character. Compromised implies the logbook has been leaked, whereas publicised means the logbook has been willingly released for story purposes.
In our squadron lore, these logbooks are not supposed to be publicly viewable by Commanders. However, in some circumstances, a log may be compromised OR publicised, allowing it to be considered publicly viewable - in this case, the information within can be used for story or discussion purposes in-character. Compromised implies the logbook has been leaked, whereas publicised means the logbook has been willingly released for story purposes.
RECORDING LOCATION: T.O.C. Solaris (Drake-class Carrier, Q4V-40N)
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... Heya.
It took... took me a while to get to recording this log... mainly because it's been... well... kind of hard... complicated, I guess... To talk about what just happened. So, bear with me... and I'm sorry if this log is all over the place.
I'm safely back at the Solaris now after my little... uh... 'mission'... and let's just say that we found out a little bit too much. Last time I mentioned I had a lead on Hivemind's leadership at this... 'temple'... and I did. I spent the better half of yesterday getting there and... well, when I arrived, I found out it was one of those [#$@!]ing Thargoid surface sites. In the HIP 18117 system... but I had a good feeling the intel was concrete, so I decided to land and check it out anyway.
It was... scary. My first time even seeing this stuff in person... I've seen some of it in the news but not much, and... never in person. So, describing it is kinda hard... The site was making these... uhm... noises... and there were these drones flying around... and... [#$@!], if I'm honest, it had some eerie beauty to it. Just seeing these massive spires in the distance and... the red glow of the drones floating around... But other than that, there was nothing outside... so I decided to take a look around for an entrance.
In hindsight, I should've really brought my SRV... but I didn't. Stupid decision, but... anyway, I found one of the doors, being... 'held open' by this Thargoid item... the air shimmering around it. Looked like some of the items I've seen before, like that one time on the Solaris, so I avoided it, in case it was caustic, and entered the site... And... Yeah, I wasn't prepared to enter these massive hallways... that had even more drones and these... like... pipes, running along the walls. It was so creepy... my heart was racing and I jumped at every [#$@!]ing noise... like a wuss.
Can't believe I was just... walking around an alien site. There was debris here and there... like human debris... metal and stuff. And I kept walking round and round... felt like I was going in circles... and there were these inner doors, closed by like... it almost looked like a uh... a carapace... like an interwoven... bone structure. I kept roaming about, hoping I'd find one open door... and eventually I saw this light down the hallway. Yeah... Super ominous, I know. I decided to check it out carefully anyway, and as I got closer I realised it was an SRV. A Scarab. And when I got closer I suddenly heard this... [#$@!]ing running behind me. Like something out of a damn horror movie...
So I spun around, half-expecting to be rushed... but someone was instead sprinting away past me. They had this like... white cape, I guess. Made it kind of hard to see if they had anything, but I ran after them. Yelled for them to stop but... the only response was my echo... and... damn, they were surprisingly fast. So... I lost them. I stopped running too, since... every single noise I made echoed throughout the hallways and just gave me away. So I continued to sneak around the site... and it was silent... other than my breathing and the occasional noises of the site. Kept as quiet as I could so they wouldn't hear me coming from a mile away... and eventually I came across this like... doorway.
It was the same as the other ones, but opened already with another item... letting me see what I guess was the center of the site. Had this like... massive device hanging from the ceiling... and... [#$@!]... wish I didn't look up but... it almost looked like [#$@!]ing eggs on the ceiling too... And there was someone standing there, further into the room... their back to me, staring up at the device. I got a bit closer and told him to raise his hands... but... he spoke... sounded like quite a gravelly, harsh voice... saying that "he knew his time was up".
And he slowly turned to face me. He was in some kind of lighter suit, looked modified with... like this... uhm... strange alloy plating... with this long cape clipped onto his shoulders. The cape had these... symbols on, almost looked like flowers... but considering the circumstances... it started to look like some of the Thargoid symbols... like their ships and stuff. I could barely see his face in the dark, but he said he knew who I was and that he knew I was here to kill him. So I asked who he was... and he said he was the 'Herald of the Final Chapter'... so... the leader of Hivemind. I played a little dumb to see if I could figure out a bit more... and I asked him why he thought I was going to kill him.
He said that he knew we were at war... so taking out the leader would be a perfect opportunity... But I didn't want to kill him. Bring him to justice, sure... but he was defenceless... and held at gunpoint. So I said I just wanted him to face justice for his crimes, not kill him... and he almost seemed surprised. Said something along the lines of... "so he was right". I don't know who he was talking about but he... said the 'war' wasn't real. Now he was starting to confuse me... so I countered with the fact that... Hivemind has killed hundreds and hundreds of our own people... in the squadron. Crew... CSF soldiers... and almost some of my friends.
But he said that "we received many a message saying that TITAN themselves were declaring war, but could never send a message back". I was... well... confused... and I was going to ask what he meant but...
[#$@!]... there was a shot, and the Herald crumpled... I tried to turn but... I was the next to take a round. Right in my side... Raised my rifle and fired off a few rounds but... even though I landed a shot or two... they knocked my rifle aside and kicked me in the chest. I'll... uhm... just say it's not very comfortable landing on jagged ground on your backpack... My back still hurts even now...
The person stood over me... and I... [#$@!]ing recognised him... It was Drake. Orion Drake... that merc I've met at Quince multiple times... and he said to me I shouldn't have interfered... he just wanted to kill the Herald, but now that I'd gotten involved... I just became a loose end... I should've reached for my sidearm immediately but... I just... wanted to ask him why he was doing this... we were working together to take down AC and Hivemind... and he laughed. He... [#$@!]ing... s-... uhmmm... he...
Mm... C-... Come on...
... Sorry... It just... upsets me... knowing he was right in front of us all this time... that he even saved Alexis and I from Hivemind, but t-... that was just a facade... because he was [#$@!]ing AC this entire time... Playing two sides, starting a proxy conflict with the help of Paladin Interstellar, so he could thin out Hivemind and get to their leader... kill the Herald... Just because... they killed his [#$@!]ing brother. All of this, just for vengeance. So many people died across the squadron... on our carriers... just because Drake wanted to get revenge for his damn brother...
I wanted to just... [#$@!]ing shoot him... but I knew he'd be quicker than me... so I asked him instead if his brother would be proud of him... and... well... that wasn't a good idea anyway... because he got just as mad and decided to take that anger out on me physically... Kicked me right in the side... not once but... over... and over again... until I rolled over and cried out for him to stop... [#$@!]ing sick bastard laughed at me and then just left... after he checked the Herald's body and put a few more rounds in him for good measure...
... And he removed that Thargoid item from the door before he walked out... I guess he came back with the SRV and grabbed it... but I didn't hear or see... my body was screaming and I couldn't see... losing focus and... yeah... all that comes with getting shot and then getting [#$@!]ing kicked until you're face first in the ground, unable to move... But maybe I just didn't want to move... Maybe part of me just thought I had failed everyone... failed the squadron. To even think of trusting a [#$@!]ing merc like him. So I just laid there and replayed the events over and over in my head... what the Herald said... that Orion Drake was AC...
Everything that has ever happened to us... has just been because Drake wanted justice for his brother... but he was prepared to do anything to make that happen. Even all the wrong things. So I just... gave up. I'm sorry. I really gave up at that point. I laid there and did nothing else... watched my suit power tick down slowly... let the pain course through my body... and I just closed my eyes... I don't know how long I laid there but... eventually I heard the door of the room open, and some footsteps running in... Someone ran past me, in a much heavier suit... and walked over to the Herald. I heard them exclaim something and... watched him fall to his knees in front of the body...
Several minutes passed until he... got up... and turned to walk over to me. I thought that was it. That whoever this was thought I killed the Herald, and they'd finish the job. So I waited... and waited, but nothing happened, until I felt him rest his hand on my shoulder and shake me a bit. I would've opened my eyes if it wasn't for the flashlight on his suit blinding me, but he realised I was still alive... said something about how he had a promise to keep... and he picked me up from under my arms... sat me down behind one of the structure's pillars... laid my rifle on my chest.
He grabbed my right arm, that has my PDA, and powered it on... cycling through my contacts list... and then he asked me who he should call. So... I asked for Alexis... and he quickly typed out a message with the current system name, coordinates... and a "please help me". Then he stabilised my wound... which wasn't bleeding... but the stims in the medkit gave me a bit more... uh... 'life'... I guess you could say. I tried to catch his name... but he just said "Connor", and then got up and left.
Gave me something to think about, I guess... and for the next few hours... I just kept my suit power usage to a minimum... zoned out and waited. Eventually I heard the structure's doors open once again, and someone came running in, calling for me. I knew it was Alexis... obviously her voice gave it away, so... I kinda made out a "here"... and she came running over. At least I can... rely on her to come save me, time and time again... heh.
She knelt down and started asking questions... on and on, over and over... asking if I knew AC was Drake and... that Jaiden was arrested... last part surprised me a little - it's a long story - but I just asked her to keep quiet... and sit next to me while we waited for rescue. And maybe the painkiller part of those stims were starting to kick in... because I started to fade out a little, but she asked what happened before I could close my eyes... so, I figured the best way to stay awake was to tell her a little bit... Of how I got here... what happened... that Hivemind was tricked into a proxy war with us... That kind of stuff. She knew some of it, apparently they decrypted a transmission from the Herald and... 'his son', at roughly the same time this whole thing was happening... Lucky me, I guess.
And... actually... Yeah... Yeah, I am lucky... Lucky to have her. Lucky to have everyone, really... and lucky to have cheated death maybe just a few times. So... we chatted a bit... spoke about how she's been doing... if she's liking my quarters, that kinda thing. Ugh... I'm way too selfless... aren't I? More concerned about how she's doing than... having been literally shot myself just a few hours ago. But... I dunno... I love her... I felt like I was going to die in that site, and my back was killing me... but when she sat down next to me... I just... calmed down, I guess. It felt like it'd... 'be alright', if that makes sense. Other than Tori - and I know I've said it before - we feel comfortable around eachother.
Maybe it's silly... that I'm trying to grip tightly onto people who care about me, and people who I care about... Not wanting to lose that unfamiliar feeling, because it feels so, so good... for once. Something that I struggled to get with my parents... and I guess that's the crux of my issue. That I don't want to let people down like that again. Not when there are stakes like this... And I felt like I did that by letting Orion just slip through. Not doubting him for one moment... and just trusting everything he told me about Hivemind.
Anyway, uhm... eventually, the team of CSF soldiers and some BLUSTAR operatives arrived... Alexis helped them get into the site the same way she did, and they picked me up and carried me to the ship they brought... Though I was worried about my Phantom being left behind... so I asked Alexis if she would please fly it back... The CSF pilots almost seemed offended, but one of them offered to take back Alexis' Diamondback to the Solaris... They're good pilots but... to be honest, I trust Alexis more, and anyway, I know she's looking for other ships she could buy... so I wanted to kind of sneakily give her a taste of the Phantom. I really like it... so maybe she will too.
Oh... And I forgot to mention, there was another Commander there... I believe she said her name was Isabella... And to be honest it was nice seeing people come out, just for me... Just because they could... So if you're listening to this, thank you, Isabella... and sorry we didn't get to talk much because... y'know... injuries and all.
So... to cut a long story short, I'm now back on the Solaris. I feel better... BLUSTAR does great work... but emotionally... I'm... I dunno. I feel okay, but... I still regret what happened... and not killing Drake there and then. I should've tried, right? Even if it meant he was going to shoot and probably kill me... but I lost my opportunity and now he's on the run again... So... now we need to find him, and end this for good... But in the meantime... I really wanted to spend time with Alexis... and Tori is still in the medical unit for some stupid counselling... so I can't disturb her during certain times like in the afternoon. So I hung out with Alexis most of the day... Spent most of it in my quarters because my back was still hurting a little.
And I got the time to properly thank her for saving me... and for being there for me. I really appreciate it, considering this is the... what, second time she's saved me? So yeah... It's almost all good again... The squadron held firm against the recent attacks, we've figured out our situation... our strength is also increasing as more Commanders add their carriers to our fleet... and, so, while there's still plenty to worry about... - and I hope you don't mind - but... I can relax a little... Just a little. Spend some time with my best friends... and love every minute of it... before I get back to figuring out how we hunt down Drake and Paladin Interstellar.
Okay... I gotta go. Sorry. I got all dressed up and suggested that Alexis and I take Tori out for dinner, as she has a break from that damned counselling course at round about this time. It's just something for us to all unwind... but I'm mainly doing it because I want to give Tori some time out of the medbay. So she can talk to people that aren't constantly interrogating her about her psychology... And it's a good opportunity for her to meet Alexis... maybe they can share stories or something, I dunno. I'll see how it goes. I'm feeling really good about tonight... It's been a while since I've spent time with Tori... and it'll be interesting adding Alexis into the mix. My 'two favorite people', I guess. Ah man... I hope I chose the right outfit...
So, anyway... I'll talk to you again soon... and thanks... for everything. Again. See ya... and wish me luck for tonight!
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Credit:
This story is only possible thanks to our squadron and community. Join TITAN Contractors, a diverse and talented squadron, and experience our custom lore and events. This logbook as well as associated images and story is property of TITAN Contractors, CMDR Radiumio. A special thank you to CMDRs Alexis Bright and Isabella Levine for allowing me to use their character in the story!
INARA page here.