Late to the Party, but the Night's Still Young.
22 Aug 2020Torrle
This is my first Entry.I'm coming up on my first year anniversary of getting my license to fly, and it felt like it was time to reflect on where I've been, what I've learned, and what brought me to where I am now. So much has happened since then, far too much to tell in the space of a single entry, but I'll do my best to tell what I can. Tales for another place, another time.
When I look back at how I was when I was first setting out, I can tell that I'm not the same pilot I was back then. I used to be so green, so meek, cautious and careful, and suspicious of everyone. That's just not me anymore.
...Well, mostly not.
I'm used to the way my ships feel now. Not just the comfortable old shoes of the ships I've owned since the beginning, but any of my ships that I've spent any meaningful time in has become extensions of myself, that I can put on like a favorite shirt to see how I want to face the galaxy on any given day. All but the largest ships, of course, but .. again, that's a story for another time.
As far as being meek and cautious, that's simply just not me anymore. When you've got enough of a moderate trust in the tons of machinery at your fingertips, and the ability to maneuver delicately, there are some guidelines that seem destined to be ignored at every possibility - most notably any speeding restrictions around starports and settlements. If they ever mandate that ship instruments sound an audible alert whenever I fly too fast, you can be guaranteed that I'll find a way to cut that circuitry out, or grow deaf to its pleas.
This isn't to say that I'm the best pilot; far from it. I just outgrown my concern of running into things. Shields recharge, repairs are cheap, and the long and haggard history of bumper cars is long and haggard for a reason - it's fun!
One shouldn't confuse caution with being careful, though. There are a few things that I'm still careful about. Long routes will have me keeping an eagle-eye on my fuel reserves, even if I'll never swap a large fuel tank for a smaller one to get just a bit more out of my jump range. I have never, yet, run out of fuel, and possibly it's that fear of the unknown that keeps me on my toes and extra careful about making sure that there's always enough for a few extra jumps and put that scoop to use. I don't typically filter for scoopable stars so that I can keep my route efficient, but maybe that's where I have more room for improvement.
Some things, though ... some things won't change. I'm still suspicious of everyone. I don't quite consider myself a combat specialist, and I've been jumped a few too many times not to want to stick around when interdiction gets the better of me. I've limped into the station a fair number of times, and do think that I might be one of the lucky ones, but I'm hesitant to state for sure, since I've been proven wrong a good number of times before.
So, have I grown? I must have; I've changed, and I like to think it's been for the better.
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And yet, I still feel like there's a long way for me to go.
It's only recently that I've been introduced to the Guardians and the Thargoids, and I've never been to Colonia or the core, so in many ways, my adventure is just beginning.