Reminiscing of a Simple Evac Pilot - Thargoidian Wars
05 Dec 2022CMDR Quadrivium
My eyes, they burn from the acrid smoke of charred flesh, twisted metal and pure fatigue,I cant even count anymore the fellow cmdrs Ive toted in my cargo holds in life supporting cryo life support. I don't honestly know if these poor souls will live, as not only are they broken bodies, but the terror driven into their minds, can never be erased.
I feel guilty for any moment I try to steal for myself, for a bite of food that no longer tastes, or a moment of rest that is interrupted and haunted by the resonating scream of the starry devils. Even on the new medic ships, all i can hear is fear as it rings thru every human that has been thrust into this new reality. Hell is truly upon us, and we have to face that this is only the beginning, and that more hell is still to come.
The only thing that seems to keep me going is the eyes of gratitude, from the children, the spouses and fellow commanders. And, my trusty Blue healer "Storm" who is my strength for every return trip. I'm pretty sure the children are much happier to see him than me, as he represents a different kind of hope to them. Whether he understands what is going on or not, he continues to soldier thru with compassion and excitement. Far more than I can conjure.
Every life threatening evac sets my adrenaline on overdrive, and deepens my fears that seem to be what I must accept as our new norm. We are only a week into this war, and already the bigger daily battle is fighting off the exhaustion and hopeless feeling that all is lost. And even more, that our selfishness and petty fighting over scraps, may have brought all this on.
But no point in pontificating the the past or assigning blame, as all we have now, is now. And right now there are millions suffering and in need of saving.
Knowing that will keep me and storm setting out again, and again and again. committed to these lives that need so much right now.
And as I pass each littered graveyards of once thriving systems, the shells of long time friends starships, and burning spaceports I have once called home I pray we survive this. And hope that we learn from each other how to avoid this in the future, if there is a future to be had.
Cmdr Quadrivium "Starbear" and "Storm" the wonder dog