Logbook entry

FSS Upgrade causes brain damage cancer anuerysms, do NOT let them install ON YOUR SHIP

30 Sep 2022LegendaryHobo
This should be obvious to anyone who has been reading these logs (i.e. the one remaining UNBIASED source of TRUTH in this galaxy), but do NOT install the latest upgrade to the FSS scanner. The upgrade is a giant scam by the corporate overlords of the federation to get into your ship and violate YOUR privacy. They claim that the so called "upgraded" discovery scanner is going to help you see further into the stars and detect new interesting anomalies and such, but its all a big fat ugly lie perpetuated by the damn liberal federation elite.

You know what kind of gear they put into this "upgrade"?! Its a new kit developed by Sirius, who doesn't care about you, or your family! They just care about profit! And it is absolutely full of technology developed to neutralize your ability to think for yourself. they dont want you thinking for yourself. they want you to be a gooooooddd little sheep commander. Buy the upgrade. put it in YOUR SHIP. Dont think about the consequences!

These upgrades? They emit alpha-cortosian bi-particles. You have any idea what those do to a commander?! of course you don't. Well it isn't good. Not for you anyway. Its good for the federal elite in their government provided housing just sucking you and yours dry.

Well I have one thing to say to those hoodsnuffing FSD hugging orbiter rats of the federation: NOT. IN. MY. GALAXY. Keep your filthy grubby hands out of my ship!

I won't be accepting any such "upgrade" and I know you, my informed viewers, are smart enough to turn this """"gift"""" down. They say never look a gift horse in the mouth, but they never met the slimy BASTARDS like these federation types who would give you a horse with one hand and take your own personal ship with the other.

Just remember loyal readers: you can "upgrade" my ship when you pry it from my cold dead hands.
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