The Story So Far: Not Your Father's Medkit
23 Oct 2021Lily Flemmon
When I docked at Chilton Terminal and stepped down onto the landing pad, one of the freight crew stopped me.“Uhh, Commander? We don’t really know what’s in these crates, the manifest was pretty unspecific, but we found this parcel between the crates.It looks like it’s addressed... to you? Oh, and where do you want us to bring the crates?”
“What do you mean, aren’t they addressed to someone?”
”Yeah, there’s an address, but it just says ‘plant person’ instead of an actual name, so we all just assumed it was yours.”
“Um… let me make a call.”
I called up Ronni and asked if she had space for 4 tons of cargo, and turns out she did- well, the co-op did.
I turned back to the freight crew lead and gave him the address of the co-op loading dock Ronni specified, and took the package from him. I headed into the concourse and took the tram home. I had barely stepped in my door when I got a call from Ronni.
“Uhh, tough baby? What’s ‘nanorobotic fertilizer’ and how does it even work? And ‘microbiome control system?’ If this is what I think it is, it’s gonna double our crop yields. Like, not just the co-op, this is enough for the whole ring.”
“Wait, what? Are you serious?” I set down the package and started opening it.
“Yeah, and it’s addressed to “plant person” so it could be used by any of the gardeners in the ring, legally. Wow.”
“Wow is right.”
“Wow is an understatement, Charlie.”
I pulled out the contents of the package, and it appeared to just contain a medkit, except it was labeled [Not a medkit - Do not use unattended]. “Hey Ronni, before you get your hands full revolutionizing the whole ring, can we stop by your place? Looks like Domino gave me something else that I’ll need your help with.”
“Sure, see you in a bit.”
And so, we both made our way over. Ronni was there first, so she let me in when I got there with the package. “Why the hardsuit? The last time you were in here with a hardsuit on was the day we met. And seeing how much of a fiasco that was… ”
“Well, I guess I’ll show you,” I replied, and I pulled out the not-medkit, and handed it to her.
“What- what is this?” she turned it over in her hands and I guess I must have missed the scrawled handwriting on the back.
You’re too much like your dad, I bet. Use this. It’ll make you who you actually want to be. I haven’t met you yet, but let’s face it- you haven’t met yourself either. This will help. Go meet yourself.
Good luck.
Domino
I looked at Ronni, and she looked as confused as I was. I sat on her couch and leaned back, looking up at the flowers along the tops of the walls, and my eyes stopped on the lilies. They hadn’t wilted like the ones out in the garden, thanks to Ronni keeping a rotating cycle of all her favorite flowers. “Hey, Ronni?” I pointed up at the lilies. “I- something’s… itching at my brain, and I don’t really know what or why, but it itches more when I look at those.”
“Beats me. Mostly? There’s so many things that could mean…” Ronni was just starting to piece together the biggest realization of my entire life.
“You’ve probably never used a military-grade medkit before, but they work with a hardsuit to perform some impressive rapid surgery for combat wounds. With Domino’s reputation, I would say it’s not too much of a stretch to say that this not-medkit is capable of not just restorative surgery, but reconstructive..”
“Meaning you… you can finally be… Wait, Lily? Is that what you meant when you told me your name was Lily?”
“Not a clue, I was barely even conscious.”
“Well, the decision of whether to use this is on you.” She handed me the not-medkit. “But if you do decide to use it, I’m monitoring your vitals.”
“Okay, here goes.” I loaded up the not-medkit, and before it fully engaged, a holographic interface appeared in front of me. Sure enough, this modified medkit was showing me what I looked like, and prompting me to change and adjust what I saw until it looked like who I wanted to be.
“Whoa.” Ronni could see it too,and I realized it wasn’t just visible through my Insight. She walked up and poked the cheek of the holographic projection, and all of a sudden I saw a representation of myself with some ridiculously pronounced cheekbones. “Okay, but what about…” She paused, and then looked up at the lilies in the corner. “Is there a clothing setting for, like, white robes? Like a monk or a priest or something? I’m kinda stuck on the Lily idea.”
“I don’t know, let me see… wait, I got it.” I set the clothing to a setting for “draped robes with sash” and set the color to white. The model regenerated, and there was Cheekbone Charlie, all dressed in white.
Ronni didn’t seem quite satisfied. “Uh okay that’s weird.” She pulled the cheeks back out, looking at me for reference. Then she pulled out the cheeks a little more, and I felt that itching at my brain get just a touch clearer.
“Wait, yeah that looks- I look… softer. I like that. Maybe soften other areas?”
“Can you pass me the primary controls or whatever?”
“Sure, go for it.” I passed her the controls.
She started poking and pulling different features, and I watched as I started to see a version of myself that wasn’t so intense, and… I liked what I saw? Because… I saw a version of myself that wasn’t Chase, it was Charlie. A version of myself that wasn’t so tied up in my past. A version of myself that… that people could go to for help. As she worked, I imagined myself not being a regular conscripted soldier, but a helper. A defender.
And then Ronni stopped. She looked at the primary controls, then her eyes moved to the hologram, then to the lilies at the top of the wall, and then to me. “Charlie… I need you to close your eyes. Don’t open them until I tell you.”
“What? Why?”
“Just… I thought of something, and I need you to trust me, okay?”
“Well- Okay.” I guess I really did trust her. I closed my eyes and I realized I’d never trusted anyone the way I trusted Ronni before in my life. I thought of how maybe I could be someone people could trust the way I trusted her, and it started to take shape, but something was still missing, the idea wasn’t complete, it didn’t quite feel like it fit me yet. Then I heard Ronni’s voice again.
“Hey don’t open your eyes yet, I’m not quite done. Just think of Lily. Like the name, Lily. For a person. Okay? I've almost got it… there. Okay, slowly… open your eyes.”
And as I opened my eyes, I saw a woman. Then I saw myself, and I was a woman. I was Lily. And I realized that was the piece I was missing and there it was, displayed right in front of me, like an angel. Lily. Me. Peaceful. Me. Lily. The thought started racing in my head. I started feeling things I’d never felt before, so many emotions. All so intense, all unfamiliar. I felt like a wine glass at the mouth of an opera singer, bombarded by something that resonated intensely all throughout me and I didn’t even know why, and I felt like I was about to shatter and explode into a hundred little pieces.
Ronni looked at my vitals, and she started to try to figure out what was happening, checking to see if the medkit was doing anything, and it wasn’t. And then she started to panic. My vitals started to flash with warnings.
Then everything was a blur. I felt more and more intense and unfamiliar emotions, and I started to scream. Ronni was panicking, and she shut off the medkit. The hologram blipped away, but I couldn’t forget what I saw. I heard the door open, and Ronni yelling for help, and after that, I don’t remember what happened, all I remember is the feeling of being intensely overwhelmed, and being terrified. But then I heard voices again. I started to make out words, and then I heard it. “Lily? Lily, wake up.. Please... “ It wasn’t Ronni. It was Phoenix, one of Ronni’s neighbors, and a friend of mine from when I worked in the garden. I opened my eyes weakly, and saw them. Phoenix wasn’t exactly a man or a woman, they were just… Phoenix, I guess. I liked them, they really were the first major example of caring about people for the sake of caring about people I saw besides Ronni. But while Ronni took care of plants, Phoenix really seemed to take care of people.
They looked down at me, and I realized I was lying on the ground in the hallway outside Ronni’s quarters. “Hey, Lily. There you go. Easy… easy. You’re gonna be okay. Just take it slow.”
“Why… why are you calling me by my… calling me Lily?”
Phoenix chuckled a little. “Oh, there it is. I figured.”
“...What?”
“I’ll explain it later. But I’m calling you Lily, well, because you didn’t wake up to Charlie. As soon as I called you Lily, you started to move again, so I stuck with it.”
I looked around more. Ronni was sitting next to me with Phoenix, and Mark and Mia, the couple from across the hall, were kneeling down with me as well.
I turned my head toward Ronni. “How long was I out?”
“Only a few minutes,” she replied. “But you did scream really loud.”
Phoenix looked up at Ronni. “Yeah, you probably shouldn’t have taken things so quickly there. It took me years before I saw my real self in the mirror, and I bet I would have screamed too if I got that validation in 10 seconds.”
Ronni turned back to me. “I’m sorry, and Phoenix is right. Take this one slow. You probably should leave that medkit alone for a while until you feel ready, okay?”
The four of them helped me up, and Mia checked my vitals to make sure they were stable. “You… Well, you seem okay enough.”
Ronni brought the medkit back to my quarters, and the rest of my friends walked with me to the garden, at Phoenix’s suggestion. We spent the rest of the day gardening like the good old days, because we all knew new times would be coming pretty quickly.