The Final Frontier is Coming Back Home: Pt. III
28 Dec 2021Lily Flemmon
OOC: This entry is in video format- don't expect me to do this very often, because it's very time consuming- for example, the render alone took 5 hours. Recording the log itself is only 2-3 takes, but it's a lot of setup- I use a Zoom Hn1 in audio interface mode, feeding into FL Studio where I can monitor my vocal tone, and afterward do all the audio editing, and also I use my new iPhone 12 Mini's facial motion capture capabilities to record my own face's movement. Secondly, "the final frontier is coming back home" refers to how, for Commanders, exploration is often a way to escape their problems in the Bubble, which means the "final frontier" is returning home and facing the things they ran away from. In this entry, Lily expresses how she's adapting to the state of the Bubble and her responsibility as a Commander, with newfound perspective she gained while in Colonia.
Hey, everyone who reads these, it's Lily again. This wasn't an easy thing for me to record, and I'm still overwhelmed by how small I am in the face of even just the Bubble. I'm honestly surprised I didn't break down crying on camera, the wave of anxiety waited until a minute or so after the end of the recording. At least my bed is comfy. It was about an hour before I felt composed enough to leave my quarters again, and I was getting hungry. I realized that I hadn't eaten in about 8 hours, and I still didn't feel mentally ready to ride a tram. Luckily, about 800 meters from my unit, there's a garden cafe. It's not much, but the food is good and it has a gentle atmosphere, both of which I needed.
It was a difficult decision to post this video, but... I really do need help. I've never even seen a Thargoid in person, and I know I will someday, and I want that to happen on my terms, and I want to be ready. I'm also starting to worry about CTAC, and how we currently have few protective measures against a determined thief as far as our technology goes, and all of us know that misuse of the technology we use for research could have devastating effects as a bioweapon. Not only that, but comparisons to Thargoid physiology/technology are inevitable, despite our technosymbiosis being fundamentally different and limited to plant life. I'll probably have to talk to the Director about that one, but CTAC may need outside help.
Stay safe out there, and take care of each other.
-Lily