Despair
06 Apr 2021Claudette De La Croix
Raxxla doesn't exist.There's no point in having wasted my whole adult life chasing a fairy tale.
I'vd sold my exploration vessel and signed on to fight the Marlinists, and if need be, I'll kill every one of the traitors.
I've been in so much pain. She loves someone else and all I have to blame is myself.
Chasing nothing. The voice deep in the void.
I was strong, I thought I could handle the separation. I saw her at a celebration on the Capitol and the new woman in her life was there.
The love of my life was smiling and enraptured with joy and I'll never have that again and I know it's selfish to feel this way when I did so much to stay away, loving a pipe dream in some maddening pursuit rather than her in my arms. I have no home now of my own.
I live amongst the Legion and I've become the counter to everything that wide-eyed girl in the Capitol wanted to be in 2996.
I'm a war machine. I've killed nine pilot's today. I'll kill even more tomorrow. I've seen things Delana would never believe.
I've seen focused beam emitters glitter in the backdrop of the galaxy in the atmosphere above
Mudhrid. I've seen Imperial Clippers ignite and explode into a thousand chunks because of a 12,000 RPM multicannon using radium-overcharged incendiary bolts.
All these memories I've made this week I'll never be able to share with her. I've sold myself, ended my dreams, and submit myself to become a blade drawn to the throat of the Empire.
But even then, even still as I lie in the quarters of my ship alone and in the dark, I can hear the siren singing in the void, just at the periphery of the silence.