Personal Log 73: The Story Of Rebekka Darrell
02 Oct 2016Jemine Caesar
Hello Teddybear.It's the twelfth of January, 3273.
Happy birthday.
I hope you're having a wonderful day.
As you can no doubt see, I'm pregnant.
About six months pregnant, in fact.
To be precise, the baby girl I'm carrying was conceived on July 18th, 3272,
in a holostudio dressing room on Capitol at Achenar.
Yes, Teddybear, you are the father.
"A one-night stand," I remember you said.
"What harm can it do?" you said.
You always were a charmer, and I was always putty in your hands.
I'd just spent two hours with Harold Duval,
bored rigid listening to him wittering on about Star's End.
It was a relief when he told me he was suddenly feeling unwell,
and said he would have to leave.
It was a huge surprise to see you walk in,
to escort him off to his transport.
As for what happened afterwards,
when you returned...
Oh! It brought back so many memories.
Those wild night of passion at drama school.
The parties, the drink, the drugs.
The sex.
Don't misunderstand me.
I've always been happy with Barnes.
Safe, reliable, devoted Barnes.
But you were my guilty pleasure.
I could have taken a 'DayAfter', of course,
but some part of me wanted the thrill
of seeing whether I would conceive your child.
And I did, and then immediately regretted it.
A baby would get in the way of my career.
Does that sound callous? I suppose it was.
I confided in my daughter, Eleanor. Up to a point, anyway.
I said I'd been raped by a member of the Duval family,
though I didn't say who.
I told her I would have an abortion.
Eleanor's husband, Jed, was unable to father children,
and he was too proud or stubborn to have corrective surgery.
So Eleanor persuaded me to carry the pregnancy,
and then give the baby to her and Jed.
So that's what I'm doing, Teddybear.
As far as everyone else is concerned I'm simply unwell,
taking a few months break from acting in Star's End.
As for Barnes, I told him Harold Duval had raped me.
Better that than tell him I was screwed by an old flame!
Barnes merely nodded, then carried on as if nothing had happened.
He never spoke of it again. Such a strange man.
Duval's involvement was perfect for my plan, too.
He's untouchable, you see.
Any accusations against him would be swiftly and brutally dealt with.
This child I'm carrying is due to be born on April the 23rd.
I'll hand her over to Eleanor and Jed,
and they will raise her as their own.
She will grow up knowing nothing of her real parents.
Please don't try to contact her.
And don't try to contact me either.
Goodbye, Teddybear.