The Olive Grove - "The Promise"
17 Mar 2018Jemine Caesar
26 April, 3289Off we go again, Tessa. Leaving yet another town and moving on towards the next one. Papa says we did quite nicely. The farmhands were unusually generous with their credits, so mama was able to stock up the larder. Just as well, because it was getting rather low. But now we won’t have to go hungry, at least not for another few days.
Not that you need to worry about food, of course. You’re just a rag doll. Mama says I’m too old to still be playing with a doll, now that I’ve turned sixteen. She says it’s time for me to throw you away, but I couldn’t ever do that. I’ve had you since I was a little girl.
Besides, I don’t play with you. I talk to you. I tell you all my secrets. And you listen to me, like you always have done. No, I could never part with you, Tessa. You’re my best friend in the whole world, and you always will be. That's a promise...
15 February, 3304
Jemine woke up. She’d barely slept since getting home from her shift at The Olive Grove. Memories of the past and thoughts of the day ahead had filled her mind, chasing away sleep. It was an important day to her. On this day in 3290, she’d given birth to her daughter, Bekka. It had been the happiest day of her life.
She checked the time, just as she had done every five minutes for the past hour; oh-six-hundred. Beside her lay the still-slumbering figure of her boyfriend, Sam. Leaning across towards him, she placed a light kiss on his forehead, and was rewarded with a sleepy grunt of appreciation. She smiled, and got out of bed.
After a quick shower, Jemine pulled on a bath robe and sat down at her dressing table to brush her hair. Her scalp felt odd, a tingling sensation which Jemine found slightly unpleasant.
Allowing her hair to dry naturally, Jemine went into the kitchenette and prepared breakfast. A headache was beginning to nag at her temples. Swallowing a couple of pain relief pills, she went back to the bedroom and laid a hand on Sam’s shoulder.
"Sam? Time to wake up..."
Sam Hodkin opened his eyes, and smiled. "I'll never get over the fact I have you to wake up to,” he said. “Honoured and privileged I consider myself."
Straightening up, Jemine began to sway awkwardly. She raised a hand to her head in an exaggerated movement.
"Oh!" she said. "I feel dizzy. It must be because of that pedestal you put me on. It's terribly high."
Chuckling, Sam rallied himself and got out of bed. He knew the importance of this day to Jemine, and was determined to support her through it to the best of his ability. He’d spent much of the previous day making sure his ship was in good condition for the trip to LHS 3447, and had even installed a brand new frame shift drive and a high end fuel scoop to shave a little time off the journey.
Once breakfast was out of the way, Jemine and Sam put on their flightsuits. It was the first time in months that Jemine had worn hers, and it felt tighter than she remembered. She tied her hair into a high ponytail with a green bobble, and then slipped into her olive green pilot jacket.
"We've got plenty of time," said Jemine, as she and Sam left the apartment. "But I'd rather we got there too early than be in a mad rush at the last minute. Besides, Galnet says there's a war in '3447 at the moment, so we may have a wait on our hands when we get to Dalton Gateway. The authorities are bound to be running checks on incoming ships."
Jemine found it strange to be in a ship again. Sitting in the co-pilot’s seat, she watched Sam bring the Cobra III to life, and idly wondered if she could remember how to fly. As the vaguely familiar holographic displays flickered on, she caught herself running through the pre-flight checklist in her head.
"Course is laid in,” said Sam. “It’s fifteen jumps to LHS 3447. I’d reckon about twenty five minutes, give or take."
"That sounds about right," agreed Jemine. "Assuming there are no delays, we should have sufficient time on Dalton Gateway to get some food before we make planetfall."
She flashed Sam a grin, then took a deep breath and slowly let it out.
"Ready when you are..."
2 May, 3289
Guess what, Tessa? Papa’s picked up a hitchhiker. His name’s Caz, and he’s twenty one, five years older than me. He seems very nice, and awfully polite, unlike most of the farmhands we meet.
I don’t think Caz can be a farmhand, though. His hands are much too soft. He has such a lovely smile, and his eyes are gorgeous! The first time he looked at me, I felt tingly all over. He calls me ‘Miss Caesar’. No one ever calls me that. When he came into our landship, he bowed and said, “How do you do, Miss Caesar? It’s a pleasure to meet you”. He sounds quite clever.
Anyway, he’s going to ride with us towards Canterham. That’s a long way from here, so we’ll have plenty of time to get to know one another...
As soon as they were clear of Citi Gateway, Sam engaged the FSD for the first jump. Jemine stared ahead, marvelling anew at the swirl of witchspace sweeping by. She’d forgotten how beautiful it was, and how terrifying she’d found it at the start of her life as a pilot. Witchspace had always held a curious fascination for her; seeing it now, after all these weeks, almost made her want to become a spacer again.
“Would you like to take the helm for a bit, my love?” asked Sam as they dropped into the third system on their route. Jemine’s first thought was to turn down the offer, but then curiosity got the better of her.
“All right,” she said. "If only to see how rusty I've become."
Sam switched full control across to the co-pilot’s station. "She's all yours, and I can retake control if needs be.”
Acknowledging the transfer of control, Jemine made a few experimental adjustments to the ship's trajectory and velocity, and adjusted pips for power distribution. Then she checked module power consumption settings for efficiency. Opening the navcom, she selected the target system for the next jump, and engaged the FSD.
"Yep," she said, "it's all coming back to me..."
19 May, 3289
You know how I sometimes clamber up onto the landship roof and lie down to look up at the stars? Well, I went up last night and, after I’d been there about five minutes, Caz climbed up and lay beside me.
As we lay there, gazing into the night sky, Caz told me about his plans for the future. He said he was going to Sol, to make a name for himself on Earth. I asked him what was so special about Earth, when there are so many other planets to go to. He told me that Earth is the most special planet of all, because it’s the birthplace of humanity. He seemed surprised I didn’t know that, and so I told him that I don’t know much about anything. I said that mama and papa taught me to read and write, and basic mathematics and science.
Then Caz began to tell me about some of the things he knows. He’s terribly clever. He made me feel rather stupid, but I listened to him for ages. He’s so fascinating, not like any other boy I’ve ever met. Whenever he’s near, he makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside, and when he’s not around I feel sad and listless.
Am I in love, Tessa? Is this what love feels like...?
Jemine piloted the ship through three jumps before returning control to Sam. On arrival in LHS 3447, she took the helm again for the supercruise journey towards the planet of her birth. Not wanting to risk an accident at this late stage, she handed control back to Sam for the docking procedure at Dalton Gateway. As soon as the ship came to a halt in the hangar below Pad 42, Jemine rose impatiently from her chair.
"Here we are," she said. "Let's find a restaurant. Once we've eaten, we can book transport to the surface."
Jemine changed out of her flightsuit and into a grey vest top, blue cargo pants and a pair of low-heeled boots. Sam put on a T-shirt, jeans and stout walking boots. Each of them carried a small backpack containing some basic essentials. Slinging their pilot jackets over their shoulders, the couple disembarked the ship and left the docks.
As expected, Dalton Gateway was on heightened alert due to the war. Mercenary pilots bustled about the Pilots Market and Entertainment District, spending their hard-won Combat Bond credits on alcohol, drugs, gambling and sex. Jemine thought back to her simple, impoverished life on the planet below; she’d always been blissfully unaware that war was such a common thing throughout the bubble.
Presently, after pizza and coffee, Jemine and Sam took their seats in the shuttle for the short ride down to the planet. Jemine grasped her boyfriend’s hand as the vessel left the starport to begin its measured descent...
26 May, 3289
I know I can rely on you to keep all my secrets, Tessa. It’s just as well you do, because I’ve got an awfully big secret to tell you now.
Caz made love to me yesterday evening. We sneaked out of the landship and walked across the field in the twilight, all the way down to the riverbank. We knelt on the grass, holding hands and staring into each other’s eyes. And then... then he leaned towards me and he kissed me. And after that we lay down and we...
Oh, Tessa! It was wonderful! I’d only ever imagined what it felt like to be made love to by a man, but now I know, and it’s the best, most beautiful feeling in the whole world. Caz was so gentle with me. I think he must have guessed it was my first time, because I didn’t know what to do, not properly. But Caz showed me. He showed me everything. I’m not a girl any more, Tessa. I’m a woman now, and I have Caz to thank for it.
I love him so much...
Verdant City’s Spaceport was one of the busiest on the planet, hosting a wide variety of civilian and military vessels of all shapes and sizes. Authority controls were a little tighter than normal due to the war, but Jemine and Sam passed through the process with surprisingly little fuss. Boarding a rapid transit train heading west, they settled down for the hour long cross country journey. She and Sam had made this journey exactly one year previously. Sam had wondered why they couldn’t simply fly to Bekka’s birthplace in his ship, but Jemine had demurred, saying that the final walk was part of her pilgrimage.
They alighted from the train at a small farming town. Jemine bought herself a wide brimmed straw hat for the final part of the journey, to protect her face from the bright, warm sunshine. After a few moments spent getting her bearings, Jemine led the way out of the town and into the grassy terrain beyond. Half an hour later, she stopped and pointed to the ground.
"Look, Sam," she said. "Wheel tracks. Lots of them. I think a travelling show has been this way in the last day or so."
She smiled fondly at the memory of the caravan of landships in which she’d grown up. An assorted and ever-changing rag-tag chain of slow-moving vehicles, roaming the countryside from town to town. A close-knit community of entertainers, labourers and prostitutes, never finding acceptance, always struggling to survive. It had been a hard, arduous life of poverty and hunger. Yet, in its own way, it had also been a happy, uncomplicated life.
A life which Jemine now realised she missed...
15 July, 3289
He’s gone, Tessa! Caz has gone, and I don’t know what to do! My heart is breaking! I’m so scared!
Oh, but I haven’t told you what’s happened yet. I’ve not spoken to you in weeks. I’m sorry about that, truly I am. I should have told you sooner, but my days and my dreams have been filled with Caz, and now...
I’m pregnant. I’m expecting Caz’s baby.
Mama figured it out a few days ago, just as we were about to set up camp outside of town. She asked me outright if I’d had sex with Caz. She’s always been a bit wary of him, you see. She thought he was too much of a smooth talker, and not to be fully trusted. I told her I loved him, but she said I’d been a stupid, naive tart, and that I should have taken precautions. She ordered me not to breathe a word to papa, because he would be so angry.
Mama took me to a doctor yesterday, and he did a test on me. The baby’s due next February, on the fifteenth, and it’ll be a girl. When we got back to the landship, I found Caz and told him the news. He seemed overjoyed, but this morning he was gone. I don't understand it. There wasn’t even a note. Perhaps mama was right not to trust him after all.
Mama said I should terminate the pregnancy before it’s too late, but I said no. I’ve always wanted a child of my own. And now I’m going to have one...
Jemine and Sam pressed on across the rolling countryside. After another hour or so, the woman’s steps began to slow. She looked around, first one way and then the other, and then smiled at Sam.
“This is it,” she said. “This is the spot. And the right time. This is where I gave birth to Bekka. The fifteenth of February, 3290. Today would have been her fourteenth birthday."
A tear rolled down her cheek. Sam laid a gentle hand on his girlfriend’s waist.
"And she'd be damn proud of how her mother's doing," he said.
"I'd like to think she would," replied Jemine. "There's never a day goes by that I don't think of her. She was so... she was... I don't..."
Jemine frowned and closed her eyes. Then, bending forward slightly at the waist, she placed a hand against her stomach.
"I don't feel very well. Maybe that pizza I ate on Dalton disagreed with me. Sam... I think I'm going to—"
In one sudden movement, Jemine sank onto her knees and vomited onto the grass. Sam instantly leapt to her side, cradling her with one arm and reaching for his backpack with the other. He took out a bottle of water and held it to Jemine’s lips. The woman took a few sips, then, trembling and breathing heavily, looked dejectedly at the patch of her own vomit on the grass.
"How to spoil the moment, hmm?" she said, with a wry smile. She remained still for another five minutes, her breathing gradually returning to normal.
"OK," she said. "I'm feeling a bit better now. But I think it'd be a good idea if we got out of this sun. It's getting pretty hot."
She rose unsteadily to her feet, swaying a little as she fought off another bout of nausea. She took a deep breath.
"Give me a few moments alone, would you?" she said. "I won't be long, I promise."
Sam nodded and gave her hand a gentle squeeze. Jemine watched him move some distance away, then turned and gently lowered herself to her knees. She bowed her head, closed her eyes, and placed one hand over her heart.
“Bekka,” she whispered. “Fourteen years have passed since I gave birth to you. That day was the happiest day of my life. You were my whole world for ten of those years, until you were cruelly taken from me. But I have never forgotten you, Bekka. I shall never forget you. You were all I ever wanted. And I shall love you until the day I die. That's a promise. ”
With tears of grief streaming down her cheeks, Jemine Caesar stood up and walked slowly to where Sam was patiently waiting. She took him by the hand, and smiled.
"Let's go home."
15 February 3290
Here she is, Tessa. Here’s my baby daughter, just two hours old. Isn’t she beautiful?
We were too far out of town to get to a doctor in time, so I had to give birth here, in the landship. I screamed and cried because it hurt so much, and I was exhausted at the end of it all. But it was worth it, because now I have my daughter. She’s all I’ve ever wanted, and I shall love her until the day I die.
I was going to call her Tessa, but mama said I ought to name her after grandmama Darrell. So, here she is. My baby.
My child.
My Bekka...
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Author's Note
Once again my special thanks to Sam Hodkin for his contributions to this entry