Proposal
14 Jul 2023Rawnu
My heart's bursting in my chest while my head is spinning like flying a high-G maneuver to evade incoming missiles. But this was no combat situation. Well, it sort of was. I went back to Selene, after a long campaign against the Thargoid incursion, the Battle of Ezra Point. Despite all the horror of war, I never was as nervous as I was standing in front of her again. We've acknowledge this weird "relationship" for quite some time now but somehow I've been restless about the whole thing. One the one hand I know how impossible all of "this" is, given the trajectory of our lives, our different biographies, our professions etc. etc. Excuses. All of them. So when I told Selene that I was about to head out into the Black again, towards Beagle Point, seeing how she guarded up and shrank away from me, I just acted on instinct. I fell on my knees and proposed.
In hindsight, this was the most stupid and careless thing I've ever did, and that says something! That moment in front of her seemed to slow down time, stretching itself way beyond Beagle Point and beneath the deepest of spaces. I forgot how to breathe, how to make my heart beat. Is this love? Or signs of asphyxia? I almost suffocated several times in my life, side-effect if you're making a living in space. I'm blabbering. Well, what did she say? She asked me to ask her again when I return. Not out of fear of losing her but out of a deep conviction that this is right for both of us.
She is always more clever than me.
So off I went, with some of the plants grown from the alien seeds I brought her last time, the seeds we planted and tended do. Let's make them grow and come back with songs and life. Now it's off to infinity, to lose myself and find my soul. And hopefully her...
