Had the "Best" Dogfight of My Life Today
17 Jan 2017Harold Sackoski
So, I had an "interesting" today. I was taking a break from Bounty Hunting to let my trigger finger rest and doing some odd jobs in my Clipper. Crossed paths with a pleasant fellow Cmdr from the East India Company who taught me some of the latest shorthand communication protocols ( "o7" ). Apparently, I need to be more sociable so I know these things.
Anyway, while I was dropping off a load of weapons in a nearby system, I received an anonymous tip in my inbox promising me a fat payday if I would go check out some coordinates on a planet halfway across the bubble. Of course, I'm all about the big payday, so I went to check it out. The message said there may be some "resistance" at the target site, but luckily my Clipper was already in surface bombardment configuration (Dumb-fire Missiles in every hardpoint), so I headed out.
I arrived at Nguna 1 without issue and headed for the target coordinates (Lat 18, Lon 50), and sure enough, there's a base sitting there. However, it's a little more heavily defended than I usually mess with alone; lots of turrets and skimmers. Plus, a Defense Force Python parked right in the middle of the base!
I admit, I thought about leaving (remember, I'd never tried dogfighting with dummy rockets before today), but there was that payday to think about...
So, I told myself that, if I launch my attack from beyond the perimeter, maybe I could kill that Python before it gets its fat armored rear of the ground.
Now, here's where the fact that I was flying a Clipper comes into play. See, when your killing Skimmers, the Clippers widely placed hardpoints come in handy because you can bombard a huge area in a single volley. This however, is not particularly helpful when your trying to kill a ship.
So, I opened fire on that Python and discovered that, even a ship as big as a Python, even parked on the ground, I could only get two missile out of each volley of four to actually hit the thing! So, instead of killing it quick, I had barely dropped its shields to half by the time it took off and returned fire! And, just to make my life more interesting, it had a freaking Point Defense Turret!
So there I was, locked in a fight to the death with a Security Forces Python, flying a Clipper with nothing but Dummy Missiles, barely a hundred meters above the barren surface of Nguna 1! I tell you, its a good thing that no one else was watching, because they would have died of laughter. I mean his Python was so slow in that gravity well that he couldn't hardly turn to bring his guns to bear! And, while I was flying circles around him in my modded Clipper, I could barely hit the planet with my missiles, much less his ship!
Eventually I had to get stupid to finish the fight; during one of his slow, lumbering turns I plowed straight into his back at full boost (lets pretend I did it on purpose, okay?) which collapsed both our shields. Then while I'm sitting there with my nose literally buried in his heat exchangers, I volleyed rockets as fast as I could pull the trigger!
Eventually we broke apart and, as I come around for another pass, I see the Python just drifting lazily down; I'd managed to kill his Drives! And with him essentially stationary, it was easy enough to line up at least one of my launchers and blast him into scrap!
Of course, when I turned back to the base, I didn't have enough missiles left to destroy the defenses. Now, I'd already come so far, I figured I'd try to fight my way in in my SCV. Yeah, that didn't go so well either. I somehow activated more defensive turrets which started blasting away at my Clipper! So, Im baja-ing it (baja-ing it = going fast over bumpy terrain in a dune buggy) back to my ship, watching my shields drop by the second; slide into position under the SCV hatch just as my shields die; hammering my fists on the dashboard while the glacially slow winch lifts my SCV up, then lunging across the cockpit to hit my thrusters!
Luckily, the turrets were fairly short ranged and I was quickly able to outdistance them. From there I proceeded rapidly to the nearest friendly station to repair, rearm, and replace my underwear. Best failed mission ever!
So, the moral of the story is: 1. its okay to fail your mission so long as you feel like a total badass; and 2. nothing makes you feel like a total badass like winning a fight in a Clipper with nothing but Dumb-fire Missiles!