MY WIFE DOESN'T KNOW I PEW PEW!!!
27 Oct 2015Latium Greenvine
My wife got a little suspicious when I put my Adder, the Serenity Now! in dry dock, bought a Diamondback Scout, fitted it with weapons, loaded her and the kid up, and set sail permanently for Wolf 1301. Conversation between us on the way to Wolf 1301:"This looks like a bounty hunting ship. You're not going to be doing bounty hunting in Wolf 1301 are you?"
"No. Why would you think that?"
"Well, you always loved the Serenity Now! even though you've had your share of problems with her. Now you're flying a fancy looking Diamondback Scout bristling with guns and you've named the ship Jiggly Bits. This isn't some kind of mid life crisis is it?"
"No, no dear. I just wanted something a little safer to fly while I'm moving cargo around."
"Why? Is Wolf 1301 not safe? Are you taking me and your child to an unsafe system?"
"No, no honey. Wolf 1301 is perfectly safe. No one ever gets blown up there. It's just a bunch haulers, hauling stuff around. Pretty boring place actually."
"Okay, well you know you're too old to be involved in combat. You have a family to think about now. We don't need the money that lifestyle brings. The risk isn't worth it. Remember Sara's husband Dave? He got blown to bits fighting a pirate in the Kaushpoos system. Don't do anything stupid and get yourself blown to bits. I want to grow old with you. Doesn't that sound nice dear? Growing old together?"
"Huh? Oh, yeah. Lovely."
Our conversation two weeks later after upgrading to one of the nicer two bedroom condos on the upper level of Saunders's Dive:
"Wow. Your shipping business is really doing well. Who knew there would be so much stuff for you to ship out here in the ass end of space? I thought this Saunders's place was a dive when we first moved here but now I'm starting to like it. I could get used to our kid having his own room. Keep up those shipments honey!"
"Shipments? Oh, yeah, the shipments! I'm shipping lots of... stuff lately!"
"Well, I'm really proud of you. Keep it up dear!"
"Okay honey. I'll keep shipping the stuffs."
"Oh, by the way, my new friend I met, Staci, her husband works in repairs. She said he told her your ship keeps coming back to the repair dock with lots of damage. Is everything okay out there on your shipping routes? You aren't running into pirates are you?"
"No, no, no. Nothing like that. I'm just... uh... having trouble... adjusting to my new ship. I keep banging into the station... a lot."
"Oh okay, well fly safer out there. You've got a wife and kid to think about now."
"Okay dear."
"You'll be ready for dinner at 7 tonight, right?"
"Huh?"
"We're having dinner with Staci and her husband tonight. We discussed it this morning!"
"Oh. We did? Well I uh... have a shipping run to do. I can't make it."
"You HAVE to make it! It's hard enough for me to make friends with you always moving me around the galaxy. Don't ruin this for me! Can't your delivery wait until tomorrow?"
"Nope. I have 5H 37M left to... uh... make my... delivery."