Logbook entry

Election, War and Wanderings.

22 Mar 2016Jim Beaumont
The Wanted status was finally over, and I ran large quantities of goods for the WP into Odu. Two days later, and suddenly I was faced with a War in Mercs expansion system. Some party called the Liberals had also expanded in, and quickly mustered up some support and it was enough to trigger a small war with the WP.
So small a War, you could almost call it petty. No CZ's, it was just a free for all in tracking Wanted pilots aligned to the Liberals. This meant in order to defeat them, it was going to be a long and arduous job. And so it was. And so it still is.
After a couple of days of doing my best for the WP, I got some unwelcome news from back home - real home and not just where I had decided to put down some roots. So I made my way across the bubble, said my farewells, and then after some short reflection I messaged Merc and Oppo to let them know I was off out into the Black for a while. I needed the time to think, a period of solitude to remember, and reflect. Where am I heading. Not in a physical manner, the Neutron Star field is the choice, a cool 16000Ly away from humanity and full of the new and unusual. It's been a destination that has been a wish for some time, after hearing of it when returning from Sag A* earlier in the year. No, not the physical. More the philosophical.
Just where is my time and life going. To what end am I doing what I am doing? To who's benefit? Mine? Am I getting out of it what I want or is it just passing each moment, each day, and hoping that something will suddenly jump out at me and give direction to an aimless wander through life pretending I have direction and purpose when the reality is quite possibly the complete opposite, the fruits of my labour manifesting itself in the acquirement of some physical entity.
A long trip might not even give me the answers I seek, maybe I even have the answers already only I am slightly blinded to them in my obsessive nature of recent happenings. Hell I might even come to realise that all this is my life, my future and I am happy with my lot. And why not. I have good friends and I enjoy what I do.
Let the blackness and silence tell me. I am not expecting some sign from some greater being. That stuff is not for me, I know that much. Rambling now, I actually have no idea what to expect.

So to the black I go. I told Merc and Oppo I'll be back in a week or so. They would keep an eye on things for me, but refrain from messaging unless I did so or requested anything. Just to leave me with my thoughts. 3 days in and I was in the star field, Neutrons and Black Holes in abundance, and plenty newly discovered. Lots of Cr for the data. Materialistic again you see.

Nothing like the deep space to see a void. Nothing like getting introspective to see your own void. I think.
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