Logbook entry

Shimmer of Darkness

08 Dec 2024Kasumi Goto


Publicized log entry
Date: December 8, 3310
Upload location: Rescue Ship Hutner, Luyten's Star


"It is said that there is always light after the darkness, that it will always be brighter after the shadows have passed. But from here, I can only see the pitch-black emptiness of the void, waiting to ensnare anyone unfortunate or mad enough to approach it."

Some of you who know me, or about me, may be wondering why I am uploading this log from this location, and the answer to it quite simply is, because this is where Aegis wanted me to go to ensure they had an accurate report on my situation when the Thargoids struck Duamta.

As for the reasons behind publishing it, while I am mostly writing it for my own personal records, I only think it right to share some of my own thoughts and feelings with whoever might listen, and try to see the greater picture behind the invasion of Sol, or rather that the Thargoids' attack on it isn't what it superficially appears to be, and is not just a pure act of retaliation for what we did with the Proteus Wave. I certainly have my reasons to think this.

So, why did I start off with the - kind of - 'philosophical' style quote playing on the saying "Light at the end of the tunnel"? Well, simply, I don't believe this is the end. Not even close. We may destroy the Titan, but that is - probably not going to stop the Thargoids. Though, let me start at the beginning, after I go over something else first...

That being - the rescue megaships. That bothers me more than anything in this. I don't know if they are independently controlled or by Aegis, but to be completely honest, where they were moved was a completely boneheaded decision. I could maybe understand thinking that some of the locations could have avoided being targeted by the Thargoids, but the ones that were moved into Sol? There is no excuse for that when we know how the Thargoids respond to the presence of a megaship in a system with one of their invasion fleets in it, thanks to the example of the Dedicant. Is it a tragedy... yes, without a doubt, but you can't put the blame on the Thargoids for this one when they were presented with perfect targets to hamper the war effort, on a silver platter. This was just plain human idiocy at work... and I don't think whoever came up with these placement orders, especially the ones putting rescue ships near a Titan, should retain their post.

Anyway - Duamta. When the Titan began closing in on Sol, as in when it was close to it, I could tell from the 'noise' that they were going to hit multiple systems around it... not a surprise to anybody, I'm sure. That is what happened in the past. Like others, I was paying close attention to when it would arrive, estimates putting it at around the afternoon of the Thursday... so I'd made sure to be awake around that time.

And I had been mentally - as well as, a little less so, physically - preparing for the eventuality that I'd have to quickly find my, or just a, ship to get off the planet... preferring mine, naturally [not just for the reason of personal attachment, also]. So it didn't surprise me too much when I received a message, worded more like an order, from Alba, to jump out of the system out of precaution, for my own safety, when Thargoids were reported entering it and a general alert began to sound across the complex not long after. So that was the reason I ended up in Luyten's Star a little later. And why I'm still there right now.

Of course, I offered to take Seo along with me, but was declined, with the motivation being to keep us separate to avoid both being captured with the same ship, if that occurred. As much as I'd wanted to object, I understood the reasoning behind it, and so instead set off, grabbing the small bag with my most important personal belongings I always kept around me. There was no chance I was leaving those behind in case the system got overrun, and I had some clothes on the ship anyway.

The corridors had been filled with a quiet tension for pretty much the entire week of the Titan's transition to Sol, once that was confirmed to be its trajectory, people exchanging uneasy glances. The Titan's arrival had replaced that with a lot of hectic, scrambling personnel committing last-minute preparations if the attack got down to here, some of whom I had to dodge on the way to my hangar. Or, more accurately, they had to dodge me. Though the tension was now of a different kind, I was able to reach the ship unimpeded, already setting off the standard startup sequence remotely. By the time I was in the cockpit, that would have its engines running at full power.

Quickly slip into a suit - as well as I could do it quickly, and stow the bag in a secure compartment. It flinging around would not have been particularly helpful to keeping its contents intact. Then, into the cockpit, and request takeoff clearance...

I'd gotten it within a minute. Some patrol craft were already overhead and ready to intercept any approaching Thargoids when I shot up into the sky, looking to exit atmosphere as quickly as possible. Immediately getting up to speed before leaving the facility confines probably broke some regulation, but who was going to care that much to check when my orders were 'GTFO before the Thargoids arrive'?

Luyten's Star with Hutner's location had been a clear shot, at least, there was no need to circle the planet to get line of sight. Pre-emptively charging up the FSD for the moment in which I was clear of the planet's atmosphere, there was already a lot of radio chatter about the local ports getting absolutely swarmed, and it had barely been fifteen, maybe thirty minutes by that point. And when I was almost ready to jump, two Thargoid signatures showed up on the radar, looking like Glaives to me based on the readings I received. But by the time they'd come out of their little portals, the drive was already opening the hyperspace tunnel, and their FSD reboot missiles came slightly too late to stop it, nor were they able to prevent me entering it with their weapons. Had they been a little earlier and caught me right by them, they could have had a chance. Of course, a Scythe attempted a hyperdiction as well but equally failed, not having the necessary speed to keep up.

I've submitted a few status reports to Alba since my arrival (and let a friend know I was safe), but got nothing back yet. Nor have they said anything publicly. I really do hope Seo's ok, she has yet to tell me if she is. I guess that can be excused by personal messages not being sent while the system is in chaos and... well, at time of writing, was attacked by Thargoids. The invasion force was beaten back some time last evening, but I was a little more than tired and just floored [on a bed] before that happened. I think. Hopefully I'll hear from someone there soon. And all of us, really. I have no doubt about why the Thargoids targeted the system, even if they might not have intended direct harm to her or Aegis... and you would think they have enough reasons to assure everyone Seo hasn't fallen into the Thargoids' hands. I don't want that, and I don't think she wants it either.

What I've done since, not a lot. Kept an eye on the invasion situation and, while I'm sure Alba will want to pull my head off for this when she hears of it... poked around in Sol. First I found and looked at all three of the rescue megaship wreckages left behind, but all that's there is some dead Thargoid ships and what remains of the megaships. Which, really, is just not a lot, as if they were torn through like a wet tissue paper. Or, to use another saying, a hot knife going through butter. Not that I like butter. I actually really don't.

Unfortunately, whatever it is that drove the Titan directly to Sol, I cannot say I found anything worthy of note. Whether it is related to the captives, when they could've just gotten more of them in the surrounding systems than to 'retrieve' ones they already took, or something about the Mars relic... I don't know. The noise was not very telling either - it was too loud and too chaotic, thanks to the fighting in the system, and trying to discern anything in it even with as much focus as I could muster, was like trying to swim in rapids, against the current. Even being next to the Titan itself, there wasn't anything more or less obvious to discern, and it appears to just be behaving as it has before.

Outside of that, like I said, I haven't done much. Most of my time has been spent just waiting around for any news from Aegis relating to Seo, checking status reports on the various attacked systems, and... that's really it. Other than trying not to be bored... I thought about evacuating some people from the danger zones, but then I'd rather observe this some more first, to determine what is actually at play. Maybe Seo might provide me with some insights from her end... I'm also not sure if all of the attacked systems will end up being cleared out - right now, it's looking unlikely that it will be the case, before some of them are overrun.

Yet it still feels like this isn't all that it appears to be. Which is why I'm writing this, mostly, though I'm sure there's a few people out there who have an interest in me. Whatever their reason may be... I'm looking at you, Azimuth. Though, not just. Anyway, what I'm thinking about...

It's what the Thargoids are actually here for. Sure, it could all just be an act of retaliation for the Proteus Wave, all that. Like I said in the beginning... or even just a symbolic act by occupying Sol. But if they just wanted to cause widespread, indiscriminate destruction, or send a simple message, all they'd need to do is send in their ships, no Titan required. Be that Sol or... any of the affected systems surrounding it, right now. Only system where they so far tried to knock everything out in one go is Duamta, ignoring the situation in Sol itself where not much can be done about it, until it is exposed to attack. And I don't think it soon will be.

Gives me more time to think about this, I guess. Because I'm not quite sure what their goal might be. Is it to take more captives to do... whatever it is they do with them? It certainly isn't anything as obvious as my own... stuff. For lack of a better way to say it. The Mars relic is another candidate, but I'd be very surprised if we somehow missed Guardian ruins under the planet's surface, or the Feds managed to hide it for a thousand years. It's not where the Titan is located anyway, but around Earth, instead.

The point really is, there's more to this invasion than just giving humans a slap on the wrist - or head, I suppose - for being stupid, belligerent idiots. And it's not a war of extermination either, this isn't how you'd go about one. If it was that, the eight Titans could and would have been marching through the Bubble progressively instead of staying at its edge. Rather than wait until they have only one left and only a small fraction of its own forces - not counting anything they're holding in reserve - to head deep into our core systems. And more people should think about that than to get blindly upset the Thargoids are daring to invade our space, after we provoked them many times... because that way, this war will drag off into eternity. Hell, Sol might... really just be a distraction from what they are actually setting up for.

I'm not saying "Abandon all defensive efforts" as I'm sure some people would accuse me of, and twist these words into something they do not say. But we should make some attempt at actually understanding why the Thargoids act as they do, instead of assuming or putting human motives onto a distinctly not human species. They are very clearly intelligent and there is more to their acts, which do not actually have us in the center of the picture, much as we seem to believe this is the case. That is something which I reminded Alba of, which Aegis was about, just before the Titan arrived - research, not just being a blunt tool of war for the idiotic politicians to smash Thargoids with, after they get upset yet again their resource grabbing cash machine isn't being tolerated by the species suffering under, or from, it.

Equally, though, as much as I despise humans and sympathize/empathize with or understand the Thargoids [to a degree], I don't approve of the way they seem to largely be disregarding human casualties as a necessary expense to whatever their goal might be. Sure, they probably view loss of life very differently to us, but that doesn't mean it is an excuse. They are probably not going to ask nicely any time they wander into our systems for the foreseeable future, but leaving the civilians out of a war caused by greedy idiots would go a long way toward being appreciated.

And speaking of that, allow me to circle back a little. Namely, to the subject of their invading systems... and that tidbit of them possibly holding forces in reserve.

Don't for a second think that this is going to go as easily as with the other Titans. Sure, there's actually quite a few people thinking that these twelve invasions and the four which the Titan immediately captured are going to be it, but as I hinted at in something I published... not long before Cocijo began moving, I think, they're probably not showing their full hand here. I doubt that this result is the best they can do after months of preserving resources away from fortifying positions or meaningfully assaulting new ones in an attempt to capture, and if you look at some of the records, the Shinrarta invasion was barely a drop in the water to the amount of Thargoid ships which have been destroyed throughout the last two years of the war.

Now, that is another reason I think the Thargoids are up to something else, as they don't seem to be fully dedicating all of their forces purely to capturing systems. Nor have any of the ones besides Duamta and Sol, plus the four which were immediately overtaken, faced widespread destruction. But it's beside this other point I'm making, which is that you - whoever might be reading this - absolutely should expect more to come from the Titan. They weren't setting up for this for months to just let it run out like a wet firecracker after a great fireworks show.

Even if you destroy the Titan, do you really believe that they're going to go anywhere or be discouraged? Every Thargoid on that ship has to know they've been sent on a suicide mission, and they don't appear to have hesitated one moment. And they're going to make the most of it, but even once the Titan goes down, they still know everything about us. Or, if they were able to get any information from the captives before they took what was in Seo's brain, confirm their existing knowledge for certain. And they're going to use it.

Whether that means the Titan may be moving on to Achenar and Alioth or continue to run rampant in other parts of the Bubble, I don't know. But there is a reason I started off talking about darkness, and why this log is titled as it is. Some people are adamant on their hope that this will soon end the war, whether they actually believe so or just want to think so to get out of this hellhole, but all I see extending in every direction is a pitch-black void.

Sol might really just be a beginning to whatever this conflict is turning into. And it falls to the people that actually care to keep as many innocents out of it as is possible.

But amidst all that, there is one thing I want anyone who read to this point to remember - the Thargoids are intelligent, and there are other motives to their actions. They've lived in space, possibly even another universe, for millions of years, so there are almost certainly things which they are aware of that we don't have the slightest clue about, and their actions will almost always be oriented toward a greater purpose. It is not one that I - or anyone else - can know easily, but if even my friend Jana, who I know just likes to be stupid and silly despite very much being capable of intelligently using her brain, realizes that they're up to something else...

Well, perhaps you should consider it too, while you're fighting what you perceive to be a simple act of aggression. Sometimes, I'm not sure the Thargoids are what we should actually be worried about.
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