Their Battle-cry of 'Oi you... that seat is taken' could be heard leagues away and their ability to out stare a dead cat legendary.
We as pirates adhere to the pirate code... and we don't mean glue. This code consists of the following rules/black pearls of wisdom:
- You're not a pirate unless you've walked the plank in dead mans shoes at least once.
- Any pirate seen testiculating will be keelhauled by said appendages until they learn that flapping their arms about is something only gulls do.
- Never, ever play chicken with a fellow Pirate, without the courtesy of forewarning them, especially when you are flying a Federal Corvette and the poor b*stard is flying a Cobra.
- No pirate shall be left behind... unless they're too slow in which case.. good luck.
- Pirating isn't pirating unless someone gets a bounty.
- Piloting Under the Influence (PUI). No Pirate shall ever attempt to fly any vessel unless severely intoxicated. Any attempt to fly sober is strictly prohibited and downright dangerous to your drunken wing mates
- No pirate shall put his @rse near anothers face unless specifically requested to do so.
- A Pirate shall never shoot another pirates space ship in the rear with a seismic charge UNLESS it be an accident or UNLESS the sick ba*stards request ye to do so.
- Big bendy burny blue things are to be avoided at all times. Unless you are in contravention of any part of the pirate code
- Parrots are not just for Christmas... they're for eating when times be hard.
- Salvage is a Pirates best friend and if a fellow Pirate is creating the salvage all the better.
- Beards are optional but eye patches are mandatory unless you only have one eye.
- proceeds of pirating shall be equally shared amongst the one who got away with the booty and those who caught him with it.
- No Pirate shall ever get between another Pirate and his or her's chocolate cake. In doing so their life is forfeit.(This may be extended to cream cakes, gateaux, buns and pies).
- The minimum acceptable pirate measure is one litre. this also applies to espresso's.
- Never take the blame for something you can blame on others.
- As pirates we don't discriminate... we'll pirate anyone.
- Endorsing the wearing of hosiery as pirate attire is strictly prohibited. Unless its their day off, then they can wear whatever they want.
- Keelhauling is only a form of punishment if your not the one administering it.
- In order to avoid unnecessary mental strain and cognitive distress all Tavern Wenches shall hereafter be known as Nancy or Alison
- The rigging shall not be used in the latrines no matter how hard times be....
- Any pirate that thinks a poop deck is funny shall spend their days mopping it.
- The only messing going on below decks is watering down the rum rations.
- If your lucky enough to be press-ganged into working on a pirate ship, consider it a positive career change.
