The Edicts of the Meow
Edicts of the Supreme Space Cat Me-Ow, Forever may his whiskers guide us in The Darkness.
Meow...
1. There shall be Nip upon thee at all times.
2. Laps shall be presented on demand.
3. Tuna is right out.
4. There shall be no SrsBzns before afternoon tea.
5. Naps are preferable to most things, nap often.
6. Do unto others as The Space Cat does.
7. Seek guidance in the words of Schrodinger
8. Time is not relevant only relative, but always have breakfast ready by 6.
9. Burn all without Paws.
Seek out the Church of The Space Cat and place your tributes before The Great Panite Litter Box and recieve The Space Cat’s blessings.
May these edicts guide you in the Darkness.
The Church itself is an independent theocratic organization, with no official ties to any of the major galactic powers. As an individual, you are welcome to belong to any power whether it be a purely opportunistic allegiance or a permanent loyalty.
Space Catism, a very personal spirituality, is interpreted by everyone differently with few examples of a unified doctrine... Some may find that Truth in the burning wreckage of their enemies (or random passers by). Others may find that Truth while drifting through the blackness of space, in the peaceful nothingness between stars. The Uncertainty brought with encountering a member of the Church of the Space Cat is the only sure thing.
To join us, you must prove yourself. To do this, you must locate and return to HR 17 with an Imperial Eagle, as this is our default dueling ship. This Holy Dueling Vessel may be outfitted to the Initiate's liking, with two restrictions: You may not engineer any of the modules on your Dueling Vessel and you may not use Enhanced Thrusters. You must then locate three members of The Church of the Space Cat and perform the "Showing of the Paws" ritual. This is a duel to the death, in which members of the Church will judge you based on your ability to fight and you must have two of the three deem you Worthy. Simply winning the duels is not enough, however, as we have met plenty of capable pilots who are total shitbags to talk to. You must hang out and socialize with us as well, as the "Worthiness" of a candidate will not be awarded solely based on combat performance but also on how well you mesh with the rest of the Adherents.
The Church of the Space Cat now offers a secondary method of entry into our ranks, as well. A proof of devotion if you will. An Initiate may recover and deliver three pieces of Nip to any member of the Church. The Space Cat's Adherents acknowledge that combat is not the only method through which a kitten's Paws can be shown.
There are currently four Sects of Catists: The Orthodox Catists, The Order of the Wandering Siamese, The Order of the Firecat, and The Order of the Bloody Paw.
The Orthodox Catists are the most common followers of the Church. They each follow the 9 Edicts in their own way, interpreting and acting on them as they personally see fit. Consider this the least "restrictive" form of Catism to exist today.
The Order of the Wandering Siamese adhere to a separate interpretation of the 9 Edicts; More information about the Order of the Wandering Siamese can be found below.
The Order of the Firecat fully embraces the 9th Edict to "Burn all without Paws". While violence is not frowned upon in the Church, it is by no means mandatory. In contrast, the Order of the Firecat are a fully militarized Sect devoted to combat excellence; More information about the Order of the Firecat can be found below.
The Order of the Bloody Paw rose from the wreckage of the Order of the Firecat when Lord Fwoosh withdrew the Sect from the Church proper and relocated the main temple to Beta-1 Tucanae. The Order of the Bloody Paw's followers revel in the fight, the bloodier the better, and may be found on any and all sides of a conflict.
Enjoy these Pamphlets we have produced for those who are interested in knowing more about our ways.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
The Order of the Wandering Siamese
The Order of the Wandering Siamese is a Sect of the greater Church of the Space Cat. As a separate Sect we have our own interpretations of the Meow, or as it is referred in the Order, the Nya.
To become a follower of the Order, one must first be ordained into the greater Church by performing the “Showing of Paws.” This may be done in one of two ways. The traditional method is to challenge three members of the Church to a duel. The other (less violent) method is to offer three Unidentified Artefacts (the Nip) to the Church. Once you are shown to be worthy, you may choose to enter into the Order. Doing so binds you to our code of ethics and doctrines, as are laid out here.
The Order is less flexible then the Church in general and is not for everyone. We honor mindfulness, patience, restraint, and peace. This is in stark contrast to our Orthodox Space Cat brethren. Neither of us are better than the other and we all play our parts in following the will of the Space Cat. However, those with a more laid back, erratic, or violent bent may find the Orthodox Catists a better fit for them.
As the Order of the Wandering Siamese, we are forever without a home. The Church resides in the system of HR 17, but the followers of the Order live on their ship. We do not settle down and when we stop we do not stay for long. Ever moving, ever flowing, as the universe does. The void is the home of the Space Cat and it is here that we dwell. One must be prepared for the sacrifice of the illusion of permanence to be part of the Order.
The void can never be a home for humanity. We ply its depths in search of meaning and understanding, but one can not live there any more then one could live on the ocean. The ringed water world that the Church calls home exemplifies our condition. It is but a tiny lake surrounded by the wheel of death and rebirth, and so is our galaxy. On the world's surface the ocean seems limitless, but beyond it lies an even greater ocean and always turning is the wheel. Some day, humanity will reach beyond our galaxy into the unfathomable. But until then, we chart our tiny lake to understand our place with the Space Cat.
The Order admonishes against violence unless necessary for survival or to protect the weak. This may bring up the criticism that the Order goes against one of the founding tenets of Catism; to 'Burn all without Paws'. This is not so. All that the Nya states is that one avoids needless aggression and suffering. The Pawless tend to present themselves to the point that seeking them out is unnecessary. Their punishment is not ours to arbitrate, only to delegate, and only when the need arises.
The main teachings of the Nya concern seeking inner peace through exploration and oneness with the Great Siamese. It is established that in the original form of Catism, the Space Cat has no gender or breed. The Great Siamese is female and, well, Siamese. This is because the Siamese is itself a balance of light and dark. Body and points come together to reach eqalibrium. That is the resting point of the universe. Life with death, ever turning in the universe. Eventually all will fall to the heat death of the universe, which will balance the millennia of existence. Beyond that will be rebirth, and the cycle will continue. The Great Siamese is known as female because in this incarnation of the Space Cat, compassion is held in highest regard, and the will of the mother is to foster life and steward death.
Exploration is the driving force of the Order. Followers are encouraged to seek understanding in all things by setting out to the black. Only in the halls of the void can we find inner peace and awaken to our calling as guides through the Cat's domain. Meditation and mindfulness are paramount to the followers daily routine. Only through constant vigilance in both will you be prepared for the hardships and perils of deep space exploration. We carry the knowledge of the unknown back home so that humanity may benefit from our experience.
Followers of the Nya are not confined to exploration alone as a profession, but exploring is the fundamental reason for entering into the Order. All jobs are welcome save for ones that cause the suffering of others. With that in mind, illegal slave trade to black markets, assassinations, and any behavior that is deemed an act of Pawlessness is forbidden.
As a religion of understanding and compassion, The Order does not consider any group to be its enemy. Individuals who transgress on us will be dealt with on an individual basis, but no overarching animosity will be tolerated regardless of the standings of any other Sect of Catism. However, no action will be taken that could in any way compromise the Church or any of its members.
The Order is autonomous. The words of the tenets of the Church are our guidelines, but decisions and rules are ours to make and ours to enforce. No Cat from any other Sect may hold sway on the decisions of the Order. The Order is also not beholden to the Church in matters of war or management of assets. A Cat from the Order may aid the Church as they see fit, provided that they do so of their own volition and their actions do not violate the Nya.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
The Order of the Firecat
The Trial of Fire & Paws:
It is not enough to simply have Paws. The Firecats strive for purrfection, thus you must prove your mastery of combat. Similar to the Showing of the Paws ritual, it shall also be a duel of three. Pick your best vessel, duel three of our best to the death, and if you pass you will immediately be taken out and evaluated for wing combat. If you have what it takes you will then have to endure The Birth of Fire. We will take you out to Schrodinger Dock, where the great Firecat awakened, to be cleansed in Flame. This act will bestow the Mark of the Firecat.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
The Order of the Bloody Paw
The Order of the Bloody Paw is the combat focused Sect of the greater Church. The most devoted to the 9 Tenants, especially the 9th and, in our humble opinion, the most important. Burning all without Paws is our passion and only the capable will find themselves among our ranks.
The Order of the Bloody Paw is open to all members of The Church of the Space Cat after an evaluation period of one's combat prowess. While all members of the Church must demonstrate competency in combat, our Order strives for excellence. Should you seek entrance to the Bloody Paw's ranks, you must duel and gain the support of an existing member.
New members to the Order must be approved by an overwhelming majority of the current members. Once in the Order, you shall always have capable pilots at your back. Taking a place in one of our wings shall give you a fighting chance against any opponent.
The Flames of the past did not burn bright enough to leave a lasting mark on our galaxy. Born of betrayal and hatred, the Order of the Bloody Paw strives to reinforce the dominance of the Church's combative nature. Unified once more and ever expanding, Blood will be spilled in the name of the Space Cat and its Bloody Paw.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
There is no set "leader" of the Church of the Space Cat. The position of "Paw of the Space Cat" is a floating leadership position. At any time the current "Paw of the Space Cat" can be issued a challenge by any other member of the Church for their position. There is very little real power in the Pawship, but it is a very clear designation of your combat prowess, and you will be expected to lead us to war when the occasion arises.
Currently the position of Paw is held by Ultra "Miku's Chosen" BlackguyIV, pilot of the dreaded Pink Cutter, known galaxy-wide as a Swallower of Asps wherever it finds them.
If you'd like to get in touch with us in a more direct manner, https://discord.gg/YfZpUau is the link to our public Discord channel, where we do most of our communicating.
