Cmdr Kasumi Goto
Role
Registered ship name
Void Gazer
Credit balance
-
Rank
Elite V
Registered ship ID
Krait Phantom IY-09K
Overall assets
-
Squadron
YKE Technologies
Allegiance
Independent
Power
Independent

Logbook entry

Interlude

24 Apr 2024Kasumi Goto
Location : HIP 25654, body 1 B
Date : March 15, 3310


This was just another grave.

I watched, silently, from a distance of just over ten kilometers, observing the ‘dead’ Thargoid spire site. It was just as inert as the wreck of the Titan, except for being fully intact. And closer to being on standby than… a wrecked remnant of a ship that had its fusion core momentarily turn into a sun.

But I’d hoped… to find more. There’d been reports of activity around the towers when the Thargoids took back the system, effectively unopposed, but only after the fall of their Titan. Which in itself was odd, and it’d made me think that there was a chance they’d use it to try performing repairs.

Instead, I looked at a quiet… cemetery, it felt like, surrounded by an eerie stillness. And despite that, I went in closer. Flying near each of the towers, the ship’s instruments still picked up something to make ‘sound’ of, faint creaking from within the biomechanical machinery. Yet it was all completely dull, emitting no light, no coolant oozed out of the spires, no signs of activity.

Not even any Thargoids. As if they were just avoiding the site on purpose - was it because they saw no reason in keeping it active, or from it feeling like a burial ground?

While I couldn't tell anything from their 'voices', I had reasons to think the former, with no Titan to sustain - if that even was the purpose of the site - but it felt much more like the latter, surrounded by unsettling, cold, defunct or inactive alien architecture, on top of the green ‘fog’ which covered the whole structure. Landing at the tallest tower, from where I could then overlook the whole structure, unsettlingly feeling like an abandoned alien city, long dead, its mechanisms unresponsive, yet still ‘breathing’… I felt it again.

This was no longer a place for anything living. Just like the nearby dead Titan, torn apart as the result of human greed and stupidity. The actions of the few, impacting billions more, not caring about the lives sacrificed. All just so they could get a few more credits into their fat, overspilling pockets, or obtain technology we had no right of obtaining.

This all really had to end. It just needed to. But neither humans nor Thargoids were heading toward any kind of resolution with those torpedoes. It was all just more aggression, worse and worse, with increasingly deadly weapons. How much time was it until another superweapon came along?

That assumes Azimuth aren’t already trying to work the torpedoes into something less targeted. Idiot bastards that they are., Kira remarked.

I know. They could already be. But ...

But what?

I'm... I'm not sure. I want to leave.

No opposition, but also no support from the other half of my mind. I took that as my sign to abandon this biomechanical graveyard, no longer with the purpose it was designed for, and began hopping back over to the ship, which looked even less elegant than my stride on a moon, or really anywhere with proper gravity. And... I still thought. The Thargoids surrounding the remains of the Titan were refusing to let go of what they had captured, despite its lack of use or significance. Or if there was any, we had no way of telling what those were.

But that was a mystery to be solved later. Maybe by someone else. Because I already had other plans, setting a course for Duamta, even with no intention to have anything to do with Aegis at the moment. My carrier, meanwhile, would go to a system at the edge of the Bubble, where I knew a Coriolis port, frequently offering good amounts of tritium for purchase, was located. Said relative isolation also often keeping that same stock high.

It was in preparation for the long-distance deep space trip I planned, though I would take care of that... later. For now, I wanted to pay the Orunmilla a visit to drop off whatever data packages the data link scanner had recovered from those older ruins I visited in the Pleiades, and elsewhere. Not that I expected those to be of any use, with those sites being all well-known and documented already. And once both courses were set up, I took off, quickly beginning the jump sequence to Duamta the moment I cleared the mass interference from the spires.

"EDI... if they try to lock the ship down, don't let them. I don't want them to... try to lock me up, because they think I might run to Thargoids.", I told the AI, when entering the system and setting up a course for the megaship.

"Of course, Kira."

What I was doing was nothing more than a gesture to show that I was still not... not against humanity, at least. But Aegis' recent handling of the Titan situation had shattered my trust in a way that wouldn't allow for it to be restored in just a week, or two, nor by simple words. And that was what I left in a brief note as well, addressed to Alba, when connected to the computer systems of the megaship for the data transfer. I knew someone would forward it, and I'd let Aegis make up their mind on the rest. Then I took off again as quickly as I'd come, without issue, and continued on my journey to the proper destination. To the same spot at the edge of the Bubble where my carrier would soon be waiting. And I wrote a message to my newest friend as well.

From : Kasumi
To : Jana

I remember you wanted to meet. I am going to be in the Bubble for a few more days. So, we should... if you can. I will be in a station at the edge of our space for a few hours, if you'd like to find me there. Have attached the location to the message.

Kas


I got an answer just a few minutes - and jumps - later.

Sure, I'll meet you there. Maybe tomorrow, though? Haven't quite got time today, but I'd like to. And maybe I want to hear what you did at the Guardian sites.

- J


-----------------

Tomorrow is fine, too. I will be leaving for a little bit longer. So I want to meet, too. I will wait there. When?

-----------------

Afternoon. Probably won't be awake in the morning, knowing me. And now you've got me curious about what you're leaving for, again.


That was that sorted. Since I didn't need to be at the station to meet her today, I could go somewhere else. Still, I headed to the system to run a query through the nav beacon for up-to-date market info - and there was enough tritium available on the local Coriolis port to get as much as I needed, combined with the reserves already on the carrier. So I set the crew up to start buying and transferring some of it, instead of having to do that awful, tedious work myself.

And, on my side, I decided it'd be a good time to pay a visit to a place I'd been around in the past, and been meaning to go to since I'd left, but which other distractions had taken priority from. Until now.

The following day ...
Samuda Enterprise, Puikis system


I waited for Jana near the station's concourse bar, since we'd made out to meet there. But once she was here, I'd definitely take us somewhere else than the place faction representatives quite openly asked you to go out of your way to murder some civilians who never did anyone any wrong... because there were better places to meet, and with a few million people living in-system, there was more than just a slight semblance of populated space and decent standards on this port.

My enhanced eyesight immediately picked her out of the crowd, leaving an elevator on the far side. And, evidently, she also quickly noticed me... not that it was hard to, given my rather unusual appearance. I came out of my pose of leaving against a wall with arms and legs - as well as I could - crossed, when she was close.

"Hey, Kasumi.", Jana greeted me, looking and sounding a little tired. Her gaze was also not quite focused on my face. She also wore the usual, snug black top with an elbow-length jacket, of sorts, and the red and black, baggy cargo pants.

"... hi.", I replied, after a short moment of hesitation. "You look tired."

"I am... a little. But I can wake up for you."

"Oh." I looked from left to right. "I want to go... somewhere else. Not this place." I pointed at the floor.

"No argument there. I can think of better places to be."

I nodded. "Come on. I know where to go. Because, I want to eat."

I had looked at local offers beforehand and was, maybe, lucky enough to find an Italian restaurant, of sorts, and it seemed to be appreciated by the locals at least. So I began to walk, with Jana probably being happy to follow, given the view that she got out of it. And I hoped that being in public was enough to avoid any poking incidents... not that I was sure, given who I was dealing with. And a first complication arose at the elevators, prompting me to turn around.

"I will... need to take one alone.", I told Jana. Which seemed to amuse her more than annoy her.

"Oh, I figured. Go on ahead, I'll find you again.", she replied. With a bit of a teasing hint to the voice.

I placed both hands on my hips and shook my head, then just... went into the elevator. Just barely. Whoever had designed these to be for one person only and made their doors narrow enough to leave little clearance even if I'd still had a normal body... clearly never considered there were non-average people in the world. At least the inside offered enough room to move without bumping into walls at every movement. And the round shape even worked well with mine.

Rather than go right back to the hangar, I took the elevator up to the commons area, looking to go into outer habitation. It wouldn't be anything extremely fancy, at the edge of populated space, but that was exactly the point... and even preferable. Neither me nor Jana seemed to be the type to appreciate excessively opulent decor and behavior, not that I knew her reasons. I did suspect they were good ones.

Coming out of the elevator... of course, someone was there waiting for one. And mine happened to be the one which arrived. That took the person on the other side aback quite a bit, as I forced my oversized curves out... and they knew better than to comment on it while taking the elevator themselves. Jana was there not long after, and I gestured for her to follow.

"So... I'm surprised you're this okay with being looked at for your body.", she mentioned, as I began taking us to the right spot.

"It is... me, now.", I replied. "So I don't want to hide it, in front of strangers. Maybe."

Truthfully, I wasn't entirely comfortable showing myself in public, everywhere, like this... yet, wearing standard non-revealing pants and a black shirt, plus gloves. But meeting a friend, like now, I also didn't want to hide myself either. So I'd left the holographic disguise in my ship, tolerating the stares of people, and... their occasional comments. Even if some of those made me want to give them a kick or 'bump' to send them to the floor. Just another part of my life now. And I'd... get myself used to it. Eventually.

"So... where are we going?", I heard Jana ask from behind me. Because of course she'd stay somewhere just to my back. I didn't mind her watching if it stayed there, because I liked all of that big, soft fat behind there too. Maybe even more than my upper half.

"You will see.", I replied.

"O-kay... I guess you're just being mysterious today."

I stopped and looked at her properly. "Yes. Now come on."

I motioned forward with my head, and began walking again, maybe adding a little extra sway to already quite noticeable hip movement. Because, I could. Or maybe I wanted to... show off a little, more than the natural sway due to the sheer curvature did. But why I did... I wasn't entirely sure.

You do it because you like her.

I didn't answer to that, but... maybe. Or it was because I knew she kind of liked my body... a little too much. And I did feel so... good, fulfilled, in it, even now. Perfectly aware of every movement of the enlarged parts of the shape, and just as accepting of them. I could... never have imagined anything like this, even just before it'd actually happened. But it did, and... who was I to refuse that kind of happy accident?

Another set of elevators ‘arrived’, thankfully large enough to fit me and another person at least. Maybe three, but it'd be getting a bit crowded already then. So it was just me and Jana who went into it, everyone else kind of giving me a wide berth. Whether that was because they didn't want to be bumped into, were taken aback, or just realized I needed more space... it wasn't important. And I kind of wanted to throw a funny look at the crowd, or stick a tongue out at those who were pulling funny faces at my sight. Jana, though, it had to be said, didn't just remain at the 'looking in that direction and contemplating' stage - because she was equally getting weird looks for following me and my oversized figure around.

“So, what’d you find at the Guardian ruins that was worth looking into?”, she asked me when we went into the elevator, and had a little more privacy.

“Nemesis.”, I replied, not without a certain hint of resentment.

“Oh. Yeah… right. That. Might not be the best subject though.”

“I know. But that is… why I went there. And… found nothing about it.”

Unfortunately.

“I was afraid that’d be the case.”, Jana remarked. “Anything other than that?”

The elevator arrived. I stepped out first, then continued talking.

“A lot of… Guardian history. And some information on their technology. They fought with Thargoids, then each other. And were killed, by their own AI. I think… that is another reason, I went there. To learn about them… because, they might return, if he does.”

"Of course. I did think... you might've gone out there because of those things. Though they're not exactly hidden knowledge, so you wouldn't have needed to go to the sites for that."

"Maybe... but I still wanted to. To see what I could learn from seeing it all for myself, but... a lot of it was not very conclusive. Like that Thargoids and Guardians, apparently... talked. But nothing mentions what was said."

"Of course not. It would've been hard to justify the war when it started a few years ago if it turned out that the Thargoids are only aggressive because we contested the same spot in space that they've been preparing to go into. Like there isn't enough space available for everyone to stay where they are, mostly, and not have to fight by going in opposite directions if they want to expand their territory."

Jana sighed.

"Look, I'd rather not disrupt the chat, don't think this is a subject I really want to talk about. And I guess you maybe don't want to either."

I shook my head. "No. But there are things... that just have to be... said."

"I know. But maybe they're better off said to someone else. You already know I don't like fighting the Thargoids, but do to defend our space."

"I have not forgotten.", I firmly replied, then stopped, and turned around. "I can... I can accept it, even if... I don't, like it."

"I haven't forgotten that either. But I know you don't like the idea of attacking the Titans much too, and I'm not doing that. If it... means something."

"It... does. But I don't want to speak of this... much more."

"Then let's not. I'd rather not waste all the time we spend together here on stupid war talk."

I just... nodded. Because that was all I could do to agree. All the war did was create conflict, even of the non-violent kind. And it was just as tiring as it existing itself. Turning around, I began to walk forward again, probably much to the delight of my curve-loving friend.

"So, what else have you been up to?", Jana asked, this time staying more to my side. While it... wasn't difficult for her to keep pace.

"I... got in the way of Azimuth.", I answered. "'Annoying' them by making it harder for them to spread around. Because they still try, sometimes."

"Yeah, caught wind of that myself. Haven't done anything about it myself though, kind of been more busy handling Thargoids in human systems. And I'd have to support Imperial factions even though I really don't want to do that."

I raised an eyebrow, looking at her a little more directly. "Why... not?"

"Because... I've got my issues with them. Haven't I told you?"

I shook my head. "I think... you have not. Or maybe I don't remember."

"Oh. Well. They made most of my teenage and early adult years, or at least adolescence, be more like living hell. And it's one of the reasons I'm walking with you here."

"That... is fine. I like that you are here."

I was feeling a little more... uplifted, today, not that I could really quite tell the reason. But going deeper into the station and feeling the effects of rotational gravity increasing, really making me feel my body, was... maybe helping with that, or even the cause. I certainly knew I really liked actually feeling the weight of it. And it seemed like we were there, already - in front of the Italian restaurant I wanted to go to. Guided somewhat subconsciously, I hadn't noticed the distance passing that quickly.

"Oh. We are here.", I pointed out.

Jana observed for a moment, hands placed on the hips as fists, studying.

"Is... something wrong?", I inquired, seeing that.

"Oh. No, no. I was just... looking. Like it, actually. Looks like a decent place and it's not full of neon holo signs that try to burn themselves into your eyes. So it can't be half bad. Besides... I do like a pizza here and there. Just hope the ones they've got here are good."

"I'm... sure, they will be."

I moved inside. As usual, drawing more than a few curious, dismayed or outright shocked looks. A waiter quickly pointed the two of us to a free table, in a corner, one end with almost like a wall couch, the other with a simple, but also comfy chair. Jana had no problems sitting down, but I... kind of struggled to fit my oversized thighs underneath the table, even when on the chair, which had no arm rests so I could even try in the first place.

That issue went away when Jana decided to adjust the level of the table to be a bit higher and improve the clearance level... which didn't cause any issues for her thanks to now sitting on the wall bench-thing, which seemed to be a little bit higher than the chair, too. Thanks to my improvised cushion and her being a little less tall, though, we were still face to face. Mostly. She seemed to have trouble keeping the view focused somewhere that was not my chest, despite trying.

"So, what are you going to eat?", Jana asked me, leaning forward slightly.

"I... already know." I showed her on the menu - simple, meat-filled pasta, otherwise known as 'tortellini', with cream and ham, plus a parmesan cheese supplement. "What will you take?"

"Simple. Pizza with salami. And you're really going to eat a large portion all by yourself?"

I shrugged. "I like to eat. It just... fits. Too."

Jana seemed like she wanted to roll her eyes, but didn't. "If you'd told me that when your body was still normal, I wouldn't have believed it. But now... maybe I do. I guess you need a lot of energy to keep yourself up."

I couldn't tell if she was referring to the implant's hivemind link sapping away my energy reserves so much, or my excessively curvy figure. Maybe both, but there was most definitely an element of teasing in there, and not all that hidden either. I couldn't fault her for it, because I occasionally felt an urge to tease people about my oversized form too. Imagining how big, round and soft it looked, how all of that mass shifted around with various movements... often led me down a path that was best left unexplored in a public space.

We ordered our food, alongside some drinks, after I studied the menu a little longer just to see what else was on it. Then, I noticed Jana looking at me in a certain way... the kind a person threw at someone else if they wanted something. I returned it, in a 'Go ahead' way.

"So, Kasumi ...", she started, playing with her fingers, looking uncertain.

"What is it?"

Jana spoke in a lowered voice. "I... wanted to ask something of you. Because of... people beginning to clear up the Thargoids around the Oya Titan. That means... my home might be free of them again soon. And I was going to... wondering if you'd like to come along, maybe?"

"Oh." I thought about it, for a few seconds. "Why... not. If you would like to show me. Where is it?"

"Lhou Mans. It's... relatively close to the Titan itself, so won't be done any time soon, especially with... that other Titan downed only just now. And maybe I'd like to wait until it is gone too, make really sure there's no chance of the Thargoids coming back into the system."

"Ok. Sure. Just, let me know... when you would like to. Because I will be going back out again, soon." I pointed off in a random direction, to show 'deep space', outside the Bubble.

Jana looked surprised that it was this easy to make me agree to come along, but... I was willing to ignore my own qualms about going anywhere near where the Titan was after its destruction, because I... was doing it for a friend.

"You did mention that in one of the messages already.", she then remarked. "Mind if I ask where you're going?"

"Somewhere... far. There is something, out there, that I want to look into. Not related to Guardians... or maybe even Thargoids, but humans. And it is still very important, I think."

"Do you... know what, exactly?"

I shook my head. "No... not everything. I have locations, and, maybe some rough general information. But, I would like to just, see it... for myself. Find out, what there is to be, by being there. Not reading old records, from other people, which could have been... changed, to not reflect, truth."

"Okay, fair enough. Might've asked to come along, but this doesn't really sound like much of a recreational trip. Especially if you're bringing your carrier along. Or maybe despite it."

I shook my head. "It is... not because I need it, out there. I just... don't feel like exploring, or flying, tens of thousands of light years, right now. If I had to... I would maybe, not even make it to the first spot. Or, I don't want to take two, three months. So... I take the carrier. And make it easy, on myself. I set it off, and... keep myself busy. While it moves."

"Sounds like a good idea to me. As long as you have enough things to keep you busy during that time?"

"I... do. I think. There is still things, which I have to learn again."

"Things like ...?"

I didn't get time to answer, from my observing of the waiter going around telling me our food was about to be there. And there had to have been some subconscious impulse changing the expression on my face, because Jana looked that way, too. And... we both kind of just remained silent while eating, though I could see her clearly observing the generous sprinklings of parmesan cheese I was putting over my food. The rhetorical question about it was written on her face, but given that the sight offered enough of an answer... I didn't provide one. She leaned back when done.

"That was... good. You picked a good place."

"I hoped, it would be.", I answered. "This one... had good reviews. So, I thought, it was worth a try. And it seems, they were... right."

I finished off the last few noodles and bits of ham scattered around the plate, picking up as much cream with them as was possible. Then I leaned back when I was fully finished, too, feeling nice and filled, putting both hands on the belly.

"Dessert?", Jana inquired, a few moments later.

I thought a bit before replying. "No. This... was enough. I don't want to, get fat."

She was lightly amused by that. "Oh, come on. People wouldn't even see it."

I shrugged. "Maybe... but I try to not eat too much sugar. Maybe."

Whether I was actually particularly good at it, that was a different matter. And a question I couldn't answer very well.

"Alright, Kasumi, been nice to see you, but I've got to go again soon.", Jana then said, looking ready to get up. "When are you going to leave again?"

"In... a few days. Maybe. Or even tomorrow. I will see." I tapped on the holo-screen built into the table a few times to get it to be active. "I will pay. I invited, so I should."

"Oh, thanks."

"It is... nothing. And I have too much money. I like to offer it."

"That's good. World could use more generous people. Might be better off if that was the case."

"Maybe." I proceeded to make the payment. Table 12, our two dishes, plus the drinks. Jana had limited herself to water, me, an orange juice and then the same. "There. All, done."

We both stood up and left the restaurant. Me, with a little more of a struggle, to get out from under the table.

"You know, you're pretty nice.", Jana remarked outside. "Don't think I'll have time for another meeting when the push against Oya kicks off, but maybe after that. I'll have a lot less defending to do and more rebuilding, you know, the boring stuff. And where it's a lot less important to be around for, so I'll take time off more often. Wouldn't mind seeing you again then."

"Maybe I would not, too. But, we will... to visit your home."

"I know. Come on, let's go to the hangars together."

I didn't object, and walked with her... unable to miss those certain, nervous glances that were coming my way rather frequently. What was she feeling? I couldn't tell. But the docks seemed to arrive a lot faster than the hab area of the starport did, despite us not really talking on the way there.

"Alright, guess we go our ways again here.", Jana stated.

"I... guess.", I replied. "So you return to fighting Thargoids?"

She nodded. "But just in the space surrounding the Titan, like I said I would. Can't say I'd trust myself to do too well near one anyway, so I don't think I wanna take that risk." A wink separated the sentences. "Don't worry, I'll be safe. At this point, they'd probably have to dump a whole Titan on my head to kill me. Literally."

I wasn't sure whether to be amused by that, or not, and just returned a funny look as my answer.

"Alright, alright. I'm not gonna pull that one again. But you stay safe out there too, okay? If you're looking into deep human secrets, scattered across space, there's probably some who'd rather not have you discover them."

"I know.", I replied, nodding. "I will be careful. And... I have armed backup, too, since I am bringing the carrier. If the ship I plan to use is not enough... it will be one with good enough shields and armor to run away from anything. Or fight with its weapons."

"Sounds like you got it covered, then. See ya later, Kas!"

Jana turned away and, giving me a hand gesture with two fingers raised, walked through the door to the docking bay with her ship. I observed for a little bit, and began thinking. Maybe my journey did hold some risks, like the person I'd spoken to about it had warned me of, but... those were not enough to discourage me. And I'd pondered whether to tell Jana about meeting that individual, but had decided not to. Later, perhaps, once I had established how I was going to interact with that other woman... even after that first, somewhat tense, but also promising exchange.

For now, I had somewhere else to be - after a night's sleep. So I returned to my ship, ready to set off tomorrow - by then, the carrier would definitely have been loaded with the required tritium, and some surplus, too.

---------------------

Author's note

Sorry for the significant delay in posting, but the world's decided that being lazy with lots of time at home to write and play games was no longer good enough so I haven't had as much time for these logs. Plus the fact of adjusting to a new rhythm(hasn't been easy) alongside a certain lack of motivation, has meant that finishing this 'inbetween entry' took a lot longer than I'd have liked for it to. Rest assured, though, I haven't gone missing, and certainly still plan on finishing the "series", plus those few ideas which formed in my head already even before I began writing this one.

The aforementioned exchange with the 'other woman' can be found here, in the RP sections of the Inara forums.
Do you like it?
︎7 Shiny!
View logbooks