Solitude in The Black
01 Jul 2023Lucifer Smiles
Solitude in The Black . At times the solitude is good. Alone with myself. No one else to concern myself with. No emotions or drama to deal with other than my own thoughtsThere are times during the "in between" that the solitude is just too much. Being alone with my own thoughts can be overwhelming. Feelings that bloom from my gut and work their way into my eyes . Some random memory of what was . Some feeling of guilt or resentment from my past. How did I manage to destroy everything that I held dear? I realize that it is grief that I feel. Grief for the loss of what was a wonderful life with my family .
Here I am ! Traveling many many times the speed of light ! That place where reality doesn't make much sense to me. The views from my cockpit are beyond amazing ! Still many light seconds away , my target planet is nothing more than a tiny dot of light in the distance. I know the reality of it all is that this tiny spec of light is an entire world of its own . Diverse and alive! Geological and biological marvels that are unique to this world .
Is there settlements here that have not been visited in centuries? Is there human life ? How has this life developed outside of the influence of current society and norms? Uninvolved in the politics of Empires and Federations.
This is to live. This is exploration at its best . Closed doors that I must open to see what's on the other side. Mankind has always had this insatiable curiosity to know what is out here. A desire to expand our territory. A desire to understand.
When I focus on these marvels, the mistakes and very bad choices of my past fade into a dull roar in the background.
My attention is drawn to a change in the sound of my FSD. An outside gravitational influence unfolding space. Slowing Solitude down to a manageable approach speed. That tiny spec of light grows into an object of substance . I see a world of water. A word surrounded by colorful rings of pastel blue and pink. The remnants of another world that was overwhelmed by enormous gravitational forces that broke apart , forming these spectacular rings. The rings themselves are likely inhabited by life as well. Perhaps miners seeking riches. Perhaps its a form of life that has developed on its own over millennia.
Firing up my surface scanner, I wait as it calibrates the mass of this world. I throttle down to the absolute minimum speed that the FSD can handle and fire off the first probe that will begin scanning this word for life and resources. The probe speeds away leaving behind a multi colored rainbow wake . Such extraordinary technology ! One probe can scan nearly half of this world. Amazing !
As the data begins to return ,there are signs of life . A settlement ! Time to strap in , spool up the planetary approach suite and see what is here!
This is why I do this. I will be okay . I will find my own way in this galaxy ! My past is past. The future is filled with these amazing blue green marbles, filled with life and high adventure . New friends ( hopefully ) ,new relationships. A whole new life that will be all mine ! I will be the envy of those who have abandoned me . Soon I will have the riches I need to rejoin the fight against the aliens that threaten our galaxy. I will be able to rejoin the fight against those that prey on the weak. I long for the fight ! For now, however, I will stand amazed by this new world before me.